Like Pulling Teeth
by dave-d
Summary: Kaname has admitted her feelings about Sousuke to herself. Now, she wants to begin dating. But, she is not about to be the one who asks. Can she somehow get Sousuke to do it? Without driving herself crazy first?
1. Default Chapter

**A/N:**

_This story is not entirely canon. While it borrows from FMP, Fumoffu, End of Day By Day, and Dancing Very Merry Christmas, liberties must be taken for this set-up to occur._

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The sound of the alarm echoed throughout the room.

Kaname turned an evil eye at the clock, but the offending time piece would _not_ retract its comment.

Throwing her hands up, she decided that her latest outfit would have to do. In a rush now, she left the other clothes scattered about her apartment.

There were blouses in the bathroom, tried on when she had gotten out of the shower. There were skirts in her bedroom, worn in front of the full length mirror. There were a fair number of accessories in the kitchen, evaluated between bites of toast, sips of soup, and swallows of tea.

She had originally set the clock to wake her up an hour earlier than usual. After that, she set it again, to let her know when she had to leave for school.

"It's today. It has _got_ to be today!"

A frown creased her face when she looked at her Bonta-kun doll. It was almost as if she thought the oft-hugged stuffed toy doubted her.

"**Hmmmpppfff!" **Kaname tossed her hair.** "**At least Mom believes me."

The blue-haired girl looked fondly at the picture she had of her mother. She had lost track of the number of times she had wished that her mother was still alive. There was so much an older woman could have shared with her, sharing secrets and offering advice. Her father would not even _want_ to consider those topics, and her sister couldn't keep a secret to save her life.

"_Oooops!" _

About to step out of her apartment door, she realized that she had forgotten her book bag. That would have been a monumental gaff. But, maybe she could have convinced Sousuke to help her retrieve it, just the way they did when that big idiot forgot her assignment book.

It felt as if that little vignette had happened a lifetime ago. If something like that were to happen again, she would hope that Officer Wakana was not invited!

"_Oooh. _Get it together girl."

This time, just as she was closing the door, she looked down at her feet and saw her toes nestled behind her stockings. Shoes were just as important as her book bag. Feeling pressured, she grabbed the first matching pair she found when she sprinted inside and threw open the closet door.

Waiting for the elevator, she mercilessly poked the down button again and again, as if _that_ would make the mechanism move any faster. Obviously, logic wasn't particularly important at that moment.

As she was riding the lift down to the ground level, she straightened her blouse some. Breathing on her gold pendant, she polished it with her sleeve. Everything had to be perfect. If things didn't go as planned, it wouldn't be _her_ fault.

The sound of her heels was staccato, as she walked at a metered pace across the recently waxed floor. The tune went from a stately clatter to building crescendo, as she walked faster and faster. She had actually begun running, just before she slid to a stop in front of the door.

"Hey. Calm down. It's not _that_ big a deal!"

Kaname laughed one of her trademark laughs, and then strolled outside. Turning her face skyward, she mumbled unhappily. A few small raindrops hit her cheeks. She had wanted a clear sunny morning. The inconsiderate weather had better not be some kind of omen! For one day, Fate could give her a break, right? She hadn't committed any big crime in her life!

"You _owe _me!"

If anything, Kaname Chidori deserved a long period of calm and happiness. Ever since a certain Sergeant had showed up at her school, things had been a roller coaster ride. While some of it was exciting, most of it was aggravating, frightening, or anxiety-inducing.

How many teenage girls find out that they are freaks, having a head full of secret advanced technology? How many Class Representatives have to worry about shadow organizations wanting to capture them and squeeze that knowledge out of them? How many members of the student council or softball team have seen terrorists, Arm Slaves, assassins, and the like?

Well, in answer to that last question, quite a few had. The Jindai High School class had a bad habit of running across real or staged kidnapping attempts. Of course, that was _her_ fault.

"No. Wrong. It's **his** fault!"

Kaname smiled. Sousuke was convenient that way. Because he the cause of some of her grief, he might as well get credit for _all_ of it. And, because of that, he owed her too. He owed her big time, whether he realized it or not. It was time he started making up for it all.

Today would be a good start. The less work she had to do to get him to see that, the better things would go for him.

Images from the past flashed before her eyes. She alternated betweens sighs, smiles, a bitten lip, and clenched fists. The two of them had been through a lot together. It was amazing that they were both still alive. It was a miracle that she wasn't squirreled away in a padded cell somewhere.

"Yes. How many girls have to deal with Sousuke?"

She looked around for him. He should be meeting up with her soon, since he rarely let her walk to school unwatched or unaccompanied. Waiting, she answered her own question. There was only one girl who had to deal with that military miscreant they way that _she_ had to.

Kaname wanted to make certain that it stayed that way. Whether she was crazy or not, she didn't want him to leave, and hated the idea of some other girl getting her hooks into him. So far, at Jindai, there hadn't been anyone to worry about. Butas Sousuke was learning to restrain himself more and more, his fellow students had been warming to him at an alarming rate.

He had actually gotten a number of notes placed in his locker again. At her insistence, he did not dress in camouflage clothing and hide out on the school grounds, as he had done before. If she had found him with a rifle sighted on some girl, she would have twisted the barrel around his neck like a pretzel.

By now, he should realize that the notes would likely never be from a terrorist. She had told him that they were from girls who were interested in him. He hadn't been pleased, as most boys would have. She almost wished that he _had _been, since his seeming apathy had her worried sometimes.

"**Hmmmpppfff!" **She buffed her watch to a gleaming shine. "Big idiot. At least I don't have to worry about any of _those_ tramps."

There was no one at school that she truly felt threatened by. But, that didn't mean that there was no one that had her concerned. In the past, Sousuke had thought of one particular girl as a goddess. To him, she was someone who never made mistakes…… someone who was not human like everyone else…… and someone who was unapproachable.

She was his commanding officer. That was good, if it kept him from ever thinking about her romantically. But, she was the same age as Sousuke, and had an eye on Sousuke herself. That was bad. Even worse than that, she was someone who wasn't entirely beyond manipulating his assignments to bring him closer to her.

_Tessa._

"Stupid…… shrimpy…… conniving……"

Kaname clenched her teeth. In any other situation, she would admire Teletha Testarossa. She had a very difficult job, and did it well. She also cared a great deal for the people who served under her. Furthermore, as the diminutive girl was Whispered, she and Kaname had a lot in common.

But, she was a rival.

The last time that the two of them had spoken, the commander of the TDD-1 had made it a point to tell Kaname what Sousuke had said after the Hong Kong mission. Tessa had apologized to him, since they had exchanged heated words brought on by her jealousy regarding Kaname. She told him that she had been weak, because of him. Saddened, she had wondered if they were still friends. That had lead to an apology from Sousuke, who felt that he was always causing problems for her.

But, he hadn't stopped there.

"_Oooooooh. _Stupid jerk!"

Tessa had almost been gleeful in her remembrance, even though she had to admit that Kaname still held a considerable edge. Sousuke had called her a 'wonderful girl', someone he really respected. He had said that she was more like a friend than a commanding officer. He had also told her that he would listen to whatever problems she had.

Tessa had danced around in her high heels, deliriously happy, after Sousuke had left the room.

The advantage still sat with Kaname, since she and Sousuke were in close contact with each other on a daily basis. On the other hand, Sousuke felt sorry for Tessa's lonely position, and the smaller girl couldn't look at Sousuke without stars in her eyes. The other girl also treated him a lot differently than Kaname did at times.

Kaname was much more forceful in her behavior towards the young soldier.

"He needs that!"

Kaname clenched her fist and furrowed her brow. Even though Sousuke had improved, he was far from what she would consider appropriate. It wasn't only _her_ opinion. The teachers and officials at the High School were in complete agreement.

If **_she_** didn't keep Sousuke in line, **_who_** would? What would happen, if she shirked that responsibility? They should probably give her a medal!

'You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.'

That saying was a sticking point for Kaname, and not only because of her sense of right and wrong, and her allergic reaction to otaku things. There were some rough edges to her. That was no secret. While she could be kind and loving, she would never _truly_ be someone that the other students would consider sweet.

Nonetheless, despite all that he had done in the past to make her miserable, Kaname still worked hard to tutor Sousuke, and habitually asked him over for dinner on a weekly basis.

She wasn't the only one who cooked for him, however. Tessa had taken that tack too, following a mission that took place just before the damn sea cruise. Gritting her teeth, she remembered how Sousuke, Kurz, Melissa and Tessa had shown up on board the _Pacific_ _Christmas_, pretending to be terrorists. No, she didn't want to go over all of **_that _**again.

What had she been thinking about? Oh. Yeh. _Cooking._

Tessa had run to meet Sousuke when he got back from a mission to Badamu Island. Breathless, she had asked him if he wanted to eat together, in the cafeteria. The dining facility had been closed, since he had gotten back late at night. Kaname suspected that Mao had called her younger friend, letting her know when everyone had returned.

"It's not fair. There's no one on **_my_** team." Kaname clenched her fists. She was quite certain that both Kurz and Melissa sided with Tessa. The only person on that damn sub that was against Tessa hooking up with Sousuke was that Mardukas guy…... and he didn't want his subordinate growing close to Kaname either! "Well, it just means I have to work harder, that's all. It's not like she's even in my league."

In any case, that needy little Captain had sequestered Sousuke alone…… cooked him Carbonara spaghetti…… and gotten him to admit that it was 'delicious'. That word alone had almost earned him a smack from Kaname when he told her about Tessa's kindness. That and the fact that he had said that watching his commander cook, he had gotten the same feeling he did when he watched _her_ cook.

Of course, after that, Kaname had made it a point to read up on how to make the cream and cheese-based sauce, learning the proper amount of pepper and garlic to add before ever serving it to Sousuke.

She muttered under her breath again.

Sousuke had mentioned something else. When he had called the food delicious, Tessa had made a V-sign with her fingers. She had also gone on to mumble something to herself about 'Miss Kaname's underhanded tricks'.

"Yeh right. _I'm_ the one who's underhanded."

After she had stuffed Sousuke with more food than he would ever allow himself to eat prior to a mission, Tessa had gone on to convince him to attend a general party for the Mithril troops, and a smaller private party in her quarters. He had found it hard to turn down the invitation, since there was never time to deepen his relationship with Tessa.

He didn't come out and tell Kaname the precise reason he was going to miss that blasted cruise, which was scheduled for her birthday, as chance would have it. She had learned about his reason from Wraith, the Mithril agent assigned to keep a distant watch on her.

Kaname kicked at a stone hard, sending it far across the street. She kept telling herself to be confident. Sousuke only wanted to feel closer to Tessa because he had always shrugged her off, thinking she was omnipotent, not human like the rest of them.

After all, Sousuke had shown signs of how he felt uniquely about _her_, as opposed to Tessa or any other girl. They had been subtle signs, but Kaname was pretty sure that she hadn't imagined them. All that she needed to do was get him to understand how he feels…… discover that she knows how he feels…… and realize in turn how she feels.

Simple, right?

"It better be. For **_his_** sake."

Hearing the sound of footsteps she turned. A smile lit up her face and she began to feel slightly flustered. This was ridiculous! She was Kaname Chidori, student body Vice President and veteran of multiple life and death situations. He was just a troublesome boy who happened to be a member of a secret organization protecting her from determined terrorists.

"Hmmmpppffff!"

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A stray cat walked lazily across the alley, until it caught sight of the two teenagers and took off like a shot.

Kaname let out a sigh of relief, glad that it hadn't been a black cat. She also made certain not to step on any cracks in the pavement.

"Well Sousuke…… how do I look?" Kaname smiled a big smile, despite being miffed. Sousuke hadn't ventured an opinion on his own. Even though that was standard behavior for him, it was unforgivable today.

"Healthy. That and well fed."

Sousuke's choice of words did **_not _**sit well with Kaname.

"Well fed?" She walked closer to him, her eyes narrowed. "Are you trying to say that I've gotten fat."

"Negative," the young operative answered calmly. "If I thought that had gotten fat, I would say that." He scratched the back of his head. _"If _I was going to answer at all."

Kaname couldn't help but grin. It was wonderful when Sousuke showed _any_ signs of good judgment. She might mark it down on her calendar when she got home. But, her grin vanished. His answer was _still_ unsatisfactory.

"So, Sousuke…… how do I look _besides_ being healthy and well fed?"

Sousuke looked over at her, as if trying to discern the purpose of her repeated question. "I would say that you look cheerful, and properly equipped for class. However, you are not wearing the school uniform. Ahhh. I remember. Today must be Casual Day."

Kaname clenched her hands into fists. She tried hard to control herself. Why couldn't that moron say what a boy was _supposed _to say? It was maddening!

"**Ooooooooh…."**

Kaname stopped walking, and put her hands on her hips.

"Is there a problem, Kaname?" Sousuke stopped as well.

"Yes!" Kaname looked down at her clothes, looked again, and then glared at Sousuke. "Is…… there…… _ever_……"

"It is not Casual Day?" The young SRT member wondered if a mistaken claim such as that would qualify as a problem.

Kaname closed her eyes and willed herself calm. "No………… it………… is………… _not_…."

Sousuke pulled at a thread on his school uniform. When the edge of his collar began unraveling, he took out a large combat knife and sliced through the offending string. "You are upset, as your choice of clothing will gain you the disdain and reproach of the teachers? Something happened to your uniform, causing you to dress in that outfit?"

"**Baka!**" Kaname fought the urge to strike Sousuke. That kind of behavior was _so_ yesterday. Taking a number of deep breaths, she pictured a field filled with sunflowers and a nearby clear mountain lake. It didn't help blunt her temper. "Don't you think that my outfit is attractive Sousuke?" She hated fishing for compliments. "Don't you think that I look nice?"

"Yes." That was all that Sousuke said.

Kaname stood tapping her foot with increasing frequency. "Well_-_l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l…."

"Kaname?" The young soldier looked somewhat perplexed.

"Which **_is_** it, you big jerk? Do you like my clothes, or do you think that I look pretty?" At that very instant, Kaname's voice was more appropriate for a drill sergeant than a teenage girl.

Sousuke stood at parade rest. He eyed Kaname up and down. Then he nodded his head. "Kaname, you sound angry." He put his school bag down for a moment. He hoped that his companion did not hear the telltale clank of metal. "But, I am at a loss to understand why."

"**I**…… **AM**…… **_NOT_**…… **ANGRY**…."

Sousuke did something that he had started doing more often. He tried to work out solutions based on Kaname's abrupt changes in mood, tracing the alteration back to some occurrence, being as temporally precise as possible.

Often there was some clue, or defining event.

What were the crucial parameters? Yes. Her clothing. Her appearance. _That_ was what she had been speaking about when she became disturbed.

Kaname stood quietly, still expecting an answer. The fingers of one hand were rhythmically pressing into her upper thigh.

"I judge your clothing to be fashionable for the times, Kaname. It serves to highlight your finer features, as you are no doubt aware. Otherwise, you would_ not_ have selected that outfit." Sousuke nodded, certain that he had hit on the crucial points. "And, you are beautiful. But, I have mentioned that before. You should recall. It was the only time I have seen you in a kimono. You appearance has **_not_** changed since that time."

Kaname's features softened. Sousuke liked her outfit! He thought she was beautiful! For a moment, it felt as if she were walking on clouds. She fought the urge to do a pirouette.

And, he had mentioned 'finer features'.

But, the full impact of his statement weighed down upon her thoughts. There were implications there that she did not like one bit. Sousuke may be improving, but he certainly had a long way to go. That was not acceptable. Not today.

"Thank you, Sousuke. A woman _always_ likes to hear that she is beautiful." She shook a finger at him. "But, it's _not_ a once in a lifetime thing!"

"Kaname?" Sousuke cocked his head. Just what could Kaname mean? "Are you saying that I should tell_ other_ women that I find them beautiful, too?" If that was indeed the case, it would indicate a much more mature attitude in Kaname than he had come to expect.

"**_OO-O-O-O-O-O-OH_**…" Kaname stamped her foot. "**HOW**…… **CAN**…… **YOU**…… **BE**…… **SO**….."

Kaname calmed herself down. She repeated to herself 'It's Sousuke, remember it's Sousuke' a number of times before speaking again. Shading her eyes from the sun, she scanned the tops of the nearby buildings, not really expecting to see anything. If Wraith was watching and listening in, he must be getting his fair share of chuckles by now.

"Sousuke, a girl likes to hear that she is pretty. _Often._ By someone she…… ummm, by someone she cares a great deal about…… you know…." She wasn't certain if Sousuke _did_ know. "It makes her feel special. It makes her happy." She debated whether or not to risk Sousuke-speak. Hell. Why not? "It makes a woman better able to succeed in the day's mission."

Sousuke ran his hand through his hair, thinking. After a few moments, he picked up his satchel. "You are beautiful, Kaname." He took note of her blushing. "Do you have a mission for today? If so, should I be prepared to support you? Do you require back-up?" He wondered what exactly Kaname might view as a 'mission'.

Kaname blinked rapidly. She did _indeed_ have a mission. And, Sousuke featured very prominently in it. But, she certainly couldn't come out and say it, otherwise she might as well go ahead and do things herself.

_That just wouldn't do._

"Thank you Sousuke. I went to a lot of trouble today, trying to look nice." She looked down at her shoes a moment, feeling uncharacteristically shy. "You know…… there are _reasons_ that girls try to look pretty…."

Sousuke joined Kaname, who had begun walking again. He thought a moment. "To receive preferential treatment in school?" Sousuke said. "Kurz said that pretty girls are serviced more often than ugly girls. I presume, by those words, that he means people are often more eager to help attractive women. I have noted that on occasion."

Kaname almost tripped. _Serviced!_ She knew exactly what that lecher Weber meant by _that._ And Sousuke had better not notice _anything_ to do with attractive women, unless the attractive woman was her.

"Or, perhaps it is your natural leadership skills motivating you. As Class Representative, you might wish to show the other girls the proper way to dress. If they _all_ look more attractive, then it will reflect well on our school." He frowned a moment. "Sgt. Major Mao has often said that she would school the other bitches…… I mean women…… by the way that she dresses. But, that often means wearing skimpy clothing without undergarments designed to support the breast area."

That time Kaname did stumble a bit. It looked like Sousuke was scrutinizing her for the precise purpose of finding out whether or not she was wearing a bra.

"You have not replied, Kaname. _Hmmm_. I know. I have been delinquent again. You are beautiful." Sousuke waited a moment, and hearing nothing, continued. "Does your wishing to be beautiful speak of some competitive urge amongst women? Amongst soldiers, there is often bragging about the weapons they carry. That is foolish. Often it is the skill of the user that is paramount. Is competitive clothing another pointless custom?"

"**_OO-O-O-OH._ BAKA." **Kaname fought to keep from shaking with rage.** "IT**…… **IS**…… **NOTHING**…… **LIKE**……**THAT**." She almost blurted out everything, right then and there. "**_AH-H-H-H-H_**. **HOW CAN ANYONE BE SO CLUELESS?**"

Sousuke flinched, as Kaname had leaned over and shouted that in his ear. "You are Beautiful, Kaname."

Kaname's hands clenched into fists. She should have expected things to be this difficult. Even Sousuke's saying that she was beautiful was losing its value. He was doing it as if he was following orders or trying to increase the combat efficacy of a squad mate.

"Sousuke. Saying someone is beautiful is supposed to come from the heart. It is a way to express your feelings, _not _something designed to boost someone's morale. _Geez!"_ Kaname's voice cracked ever so slightly. "If you say it like 'nice shot' or 'keep up the good work, soldier', then it won't mean _anything."_

Sousuke took out a small pad of paper and scribbled down some notes. "Anything else, Kaname?"

Kaname just closed her eyes and started counting backwards from fifty.

"Sousuke," she said in a quiet but steady voice. "Some girls dress up nice, as a matter of pride. Others want to catch someone's eye." She paused, and glanced at Sousuke for a moment, before inexplicably looking away. "One very important time for girls to dress their best…… and make every effort to look pretty…… is on a date."

She found it hard to swallow. Her heart was beating fiercely. The palms of her hands felt just a touch sweaty. There it was. She couldn't have dropped a bigger hint. Now, the big idiot only had to do his part.

It was a matter of principal. Kaname wanted Sousuke to ask her out on a date. She had no intention of being the one who did the asking. No. None at all! That big jerk might have been raised with freedom fighters, but that is not the same as being raised by wolves or hamsters or something.

"I see…." Sousuke said, staring at Kaname for a few moments. "Pride." He nodded his head, and shocked her by grinning. "You have many reasons to be proud."

Kaname was too stunned… and too disappointed… to manage even a meager shout. Instead, she threw her hands in the air and stomped off to school at a pace that had Sousuke hurrying to catch up.

_Damn him!_

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Most of the desks were filled in homeroom.

Before long, the teacher ought to arrive, and the students would settle down. The few visitors would be heading off to their own rooms. For now, everyone was talking, acting out, or sitting peacefully at their seats.

_Everyone except Kaname._

**WHAM!**

The sound that Kaname's book case made when it slammed into the top of her desk had a number of students looking in that direction, until they saw who it was.

"Ka-naaaa-maaay…" Kyouko said to her best friend. "What's wrong? Did Sousuke do something again?" She looked around the room. "Where is he, anyway?"

**SLAM! SLAM! _BANG!_**

Clenching her teeth, Kaname threw books inside of her desk compartment. A number of students began muttering expectantly, wondering if the blue-haired girl was going to explode over something again.

"He's on the roof!" Kaname spat out. "I told him that I saw a suspicious character up there. _That_ ought to keep him busy for a while!"

**WHANG!**

Kaname slammed her fist down onto her desk. The legs buckled ever so slightly. She winced, feeling the pain shoot up her arm. She knew who to blame for that pain.

No, she knew who to blame for _everything._

"So, Kaname…… are you upset or something?" Kyouko's voice may have sounded innocent, but there was a knowing sparkle in her eyes.

Ever so slowly, Kaname turned to look back at her friend. The look on her face had Kyouko's eyes going wide. **"**Whatever………… makes……….. you……….. think………. _that_…."

Ryo and Maya hurried over to see what was wrong _this_ time. They were joined by Mizuki, who had a rather hopeful look in her eyes. Ren slid over smoothly as well, ready to offer any reassurance that might be necessary before she went on her way.

"Kaname doesn't look upset," Ryo stated, rolling her eyes.

"No, not at all. I wouldn't call that look upset." Maya fought back a smile.

"She looks way beyond upset!" Mizuki rubbed her hands together. "I wonder if it has anything to do with what happened yesterday. Or what happened the day before that." That ought to be enough bait for the hook.

"Mizuki, we said we weren't going to mention that." Ren spoke in a very soothing but stern voice. "Remember?"

"I remember you, Ryo, and Maya promising." Mizuki looked like the Cheshire Cat. "I didn't!"

"I think it's time we all sat in our seats now…." Ryo offered. To back up her words, she went and sat down. It wouldn't do to be to close to ground zero. "You and Ren should hurry on your way." She knew that Mizuki wouldn't leave until she had a chance to cause more mischief.

"You're right. Only a couple of minutes left." Maya went to seat herself. She shook her head, wondering just how long Mizuki would harbor her grudge.

Ren gave Mizuki a pointed look, but the eager girl didn't pay any attention. Even though she had become more friendly with Kaname, she still held tight to some grievances suffered during the whole Shirai episode.

"_So?_ Why don't we get this over with?" Kaname's look had everyone nearby listening in. "I'm certain it will be the high point of your week." Kaname was in no mood for any of Mizuki's nonsense. Still, her natural reactions took over.

Just what had Sousuke done this time?

"_Ohhhh-h-h-h_." Mizuki sneered. "I take it that you haven't been outside to see the Serenity Garden that a certain Student Council Vice President worked so hard to earn money for." Her smile grew by leaps and bounds.

Kyouko was waving her hands, mouthing 'no' to Mizuki, Kaname turned to look at her friend. She'd rather hear it from Kyouko than Mizuki.

"Well…." Kyouko looked up at the clock, hoping that the teacher would walk in. "Some girls were enjoying the flowers there." She looked over at the door. No teacher yet. "One of them said that 'the sunflowers are the bomb'." She sighed. "Sousuke overheard her."

"_And-d-d-d-d_…." Kaname gripped the side of her desk with both hands. She already had a good idea what prompted the trouble.

"He pulled them all up, looking for hidden explosives. He said that the gardening crew that planted the garden had a Middle Eastern look to them. And he said that the company name Floral Foundations was worrisome, since the word _Qaeda_ means 'foundation' or 'base'." Kyouko cringed ever so slightly.

Nothing happened. Kaname just shrugged. She had bigger concerns that day. Mizuki looked rather miffed. But, another smile began creeping across her face.

"The next one ought to do it, though." Ryo nodded her head knowingly.

"You bet," Maya agreed.

Kaname glowered at her friends. Ignoring Mizuki, she looked at Kyouko again.

"I…… I wasn't there…… Mizuki and the others were." Kyouko slouched down in her chair when Kaname frowned.

"You know that girl who has been following Sousuke around lately?" Mizuki smiled. "The latest one who sticks _those_ kind of notes in his locker…."

Kaname didn't say anything. She wasn't worried about some underclassmen transfer student. "Well, she collapsed in front of Sousuke yesterday, outside by the fence." Mizuki pretended to swoon. "Her friends cried out that she had stopped breathing and asked if anyone knew CPR."

Kaname bit the inside of her cheek. She could already see where this one was going.

"Naturally, Sousuke did!" Mizuke looked at Kaname's face expectantly. She scowled when her report drew no response. "He was busy working on her, for quite a while." Still, nothing. "You know…… lips on her lips…… hands pushing down right between her breasts…."

Kaname's desk moved a bit as she twitched.

"The best part came when the girl wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and pulled him down on her for a long kiss." Mizuki was positively beaming. Kyouko reached for her camera, but put it back down.

"I see…." Kaname kept a serene look on her face. "My _friends_ were all there…… but none of them put a stop to the charade…."

"Well, you know…." That was all that Maya managed to get out.

"When I got there, I couldn't tell if there was a true emergency or not," Ren said honestly. Catching Mizuki's attention, she pointed to her watch. Sighing, she headed off for her homeroom.

"Hey, but it's not like Sousuke is your boyfriend or anything, right?" Ryo held her hands up.

"**AH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH HAH _HAH-H-H-H-H_**……" Kaname tossed her hair. "Of course not!" Under her breath, she said 'yet'.

"I suggested the idea to the girl," Mizuki said. She was still miffed at the kiss that Sousuke gave her when he was pretending to be Shirai. "It worked pretty well. I wonder if Sousuke enjoyed it?"

The wood at the edge of Kaname's desk cracked. It would have splintered off if she hadn't let go. Eyes narrowed, she managed a nasty smile.

"Still have a thing for Tsubaki?" She asked Mizuki, noting how the other girl blushed and brought her hands to her chest.

Mizuki didn't say anything.

"Well, he keeps pestering me. Even though I'm not interested in him, he doesn't seem to want to believe that. _So-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o_…." Kaname winked at Kyouko. "I can tell him that I would _never_ have any intention of dating him if he ever paid even the slightest attention to…." She looked at Mizuki. "What was your name again?"

Mizuki went absolutely pale.

"Oh…." Kaname fluffed her hair. "Those stories about Sousuke were quite amusing. Thank you." She raised an eyebrow when Mizuki stood there with her mouth open. "Kyouko…… would you be a dear, and show our forgetful friend the way to the door…… her teacher ought to start attendance soon."

She watched as Mizuki gave her a nasty look as she hurried off.

"**Hmmmpppfff!**" For a moment, Kaname forgot that she was very upset. Her reminder arrived just before the teacher did.

"Kaname." It was Sousuke. He was wiping his hands with a rag that smelled strongly of mineral spirits. "Your concern was unfounded. The man on the roof was truly a painter. There was nothing suspicious hidden in any of the paint cans."

Kaname gripped the edge of her desk again.

"He didn't have any identification on him. And, the specific tattoo on his arm identified him as a former soldier. My actions were clearly justified." Sousuke didn't look concerned.

The tortured wood of Kaname's desk finally broke. She stared at the fragment in her hand. "What…… did…… you…… _do_…… Sousuke?"

Everyone in the class went silent, listening in. Even the teacher kept quiet, not making her presence known yet as she hovered at the doorway.

"The paint can _should_ be easy enough to remove from the man's head. I approached the janitor. He will take care of it."

After Sousuke's words, the sound of a chainsaw could be heard outside. That was followed by the grinding sound of metal upon metal.

Kaname placed her face down on her desk.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

A cherry blossom felt off the branch, floating downward.

The petals landed in Kaname's drink, causing her to sigh and shake her head. It was shaping up to be one of those days.But why _this_ day?

Was there some reason that nothing seemed to go quite right in her life? Sure, she was being a bit melodramatic, but she had earned the right.

_Had she ever!_

"I need your help, Kyouko."

"Kaname?" Kyouko put down her sandwich. "What's wrong? I hope it's not the Serenity Garden…… or that girl…."

Kaname shook her head.

"You guys have guessed how I feel about Sousuke, _haven't_ you?" Her look was serious. "I guess that I've been somewhat more obvious lately." She squeezed her plastic cup too hard. Soda seeped out of the spider web cracks. "To everyone butSousuke!"

"Yes," Kyouko said, before wiping her mouth with her paper napkin. "Shinji, Tsubaki, Oonuki, and the other guys just laugh it off. But the girls believe, for the most part." She picked up a bean jam bun and nibble on it, crumbs falling from her mouth when she spoke. "Guys aren't too bright, I guess."

"You can say **_that_** again!" Kaname frowned, seeing the look on Kyouko's face. "What?"

Kyouko simply pointed. The sandwich Kaname had picked up was now a crushed ruin in her hand. Kaname hung her head.

"So, what did he do _this_ time?" Kyouko looked sympathetic. "Or, is it something he _hasn't _done?" She finished off the bun in a few more bites, waiting for her friend to answer.

"Well, I like to think that I'm a normal girl." Kaname bit her lip, knowing that being Whispered was far from normal. But, that wasn't what she meant. "I want what normal girls would want."

Would normal girls want anything to do with a certain misguided military mistake-monger?

"Oh," Kyouko rubbed her fingers together for a moment. "Do you mean…… dating?" She looked down at her lunch bag. As a somewhat shy and awkward girl, she didn't hold out much hope for having anyone ask _her_ out on dates.

"Yes. I know that it sounds crazy!" Kaname said. "Not that I would want to go on dates. Just…."

"Sousuke," Kyouko offered. "He does try really hard though. If he didn't…… _you_ _know_…."

Kaname sighed. "See enemies behind every bush…… destroy more school property than a gang of vandals……misinterpret every other thing he hears… and bring cluelessness to new heights on a daily basis…."

"Uh huh. Those too." Kyouko offered her friend a homemade cookie. Seeing the despondent look on her face, she handed over the entire plate. "But, he _is_ very dependable in his own way. And he's always looking out for you, even when it gets him in big trouble."

"**OOOOOOOOH!**" Kaname took a savage bite of one cookie. "That's just it. In his own way, he can be the sweetest guy you could hope to meet. And, he is definitely the bravest!" She finished off the cookie. "One minute I think he is really great, and is making some kind of improvement. But then, before I know it…."

"Boom!" Kyouko said.

"Yeh. Boom." Kaname took a moment to watch the clouds overhead. She checked her watch. It was almost time for their next class.

"So, what did you need me to do, Kaname?" Kyouko asked with a fair bit of trepidation.

"I thought you'd never ask." Kaname smiled.


	2. Two

A number of students strolled across the school grounds.

It was a rare day that provided such an opportunity at this hour. Career councilors were meeting with the first group of students, and would be doing so with the students sporadically over the next few weeks.

Kaname had told Sousuke that she would be meeting with other members of the Student Council, so he would **_not _**be able to keep a close watch on her. At her insistence, he was using his free time to do extra homework in the subjects that troubled him the most.

Sitting alone, the young soldier had his papers and textbooks arranged along a short masonry wall. Scratching his head, he did his best to assimilate as many facts about Japanese History as he could. Not having spent many years in his ancestral country, he lacked the basics that everyone else took for granted.

Unbeknownst to him, Kaname was peering between a pair of tall leafy shrubs, waiting for the next step in her plan to unfold. Ignoring jibes and giggles from Maya and Ryo, she sent Kyouko into action. An angry look on her face, she shushed her friends. The _last _thing that she wanted was for a certain young soldier to realize that she was nearby.

Prior to hiding out in the landscape, Kaname had actually taken a quick shower. But, it had been a _tactical_ necessity. She needed to wash away any scent of her perfume, in case Sousuke might catch a whiff of it.

"Hello, Sousuke!" Kyouko's friendly greeting had the young agent lifting his head. "Getting some extra studying in? I bet that will make Kaname happy!"

Sousuke shrugged. "I am never****certain what will make Kaname happy. Sometimes, I am convinced that Kaname herself has no idea what will make her happy. I have suggested that she see a psychiatrist on a number of occasions." He closed one of his books. "That most definitely did _not_ make her happy."

Kaname, turning red in the face, snapped one of the long boughs of the nearest plant. The snickering coming from Maya and Ryo caused her to shred the leaves off of the wounded piece. The sap had her hand itching.

"Oh…… I _see_…." Kyouko fought a grin, knowing that Kaname was listening in. She tried to figure out how to carry out her mission, as she had been told not to mention Kaname by name, regarding the one particular issue. Sousuke was supposed to think of her on his own, and take the necessary steps after that, no matter how rudimentary.

"I feel that it is important to look out for her well-being, but _she_ does not usually see things that way." Sousuke put the cap on his pen and placed it in the spiral binding of his notebook. "The other day, she was indulging in far more sugar-laden food items than one would expect. I suggested that she refrain from doing so, given some things that I had overheard."

"Sousuke?" Kyouko asked.

"A group of boys was discussing the comparative aesthetic features of various female classmates. Kaname figured prominently in that discourse. Not wishing Kaname's reputation to suffer, I reported what I had heard." Sousuke looked down at the bruise on the back of his hand. It was finally fading.

"What did you tell her?" Kyouko pushed her glasses further up her nose, and then listened with an avid look on her face.

"I told her that the boys had commented on her…… _uhhh_…… posterior portion being battleship like." Sousuke's eyes lit up. He was in his element, in some fashion. "I had informed them that they were incorrect. A heavy cruiser would have been a better analogy."

"Oh…." Kyouko covered her mouth with her hand.

A series of snapping noises accompanied Kaname's progressive destruction of the shrubbery. Ryo and Maya wisely backed out of range. Their laughter blended in with the conversations taking place amongst the other high school students.

Kaname tripped, when she took a step forward, fists clenched. Her nose was soon buried in newly spread cow manure that had been layered underneath a topping of wood chips. Only a tremendous act of will kept her from rushing over to Sousuke.

"So, do you find yourself watching Kaname's…… posterior portion?" Kyouko couldn't help herself. She felt justified, as just such an admission from Sousuke might dovetail well with her assignment.

Sousuke froze. His eyes looked just the slightest bit wild. The fingers on one hand twitched, before he wrapped them around one of his books. "Uhhh…." He began sweating. "As you are well aware, there are things that take place which are **_not_** entirely voluntary." That was all he was going to say on the matter.

Kaname used a tissue to wipe off her face. She smiled a small smile when she heard Sousuke's answer. That 'Uhhh' spoke volumes to her.

Kyouko looked at her watch, realizing that she had to push forward. She would try her best, but was well aware of how clueless Sousuke was. Her best friend had asked for a favor…well, had come close to _ordering _her to do this…and she would do whatever she could.

Sousuke, did you notice that there was a girl today……" She fought for the proper words, but would have to go with whatever came to mind. "A girl who went to a lot of trouble to dress nicely…."

The young soldier rubbed his neck, adopting a contemplative pose. While he was thinking, he looked over at Kyouko. "_You _appear to be dressed in a relatively attractive manner today."

"Oh. Thank you." Kyouko pulled at one of her pony tails. The focus was not supposed to be on her. "And did you notice that a certain girl wanted to take the time to talk about the reasons that women make themselves look special?"

"Is that what you are doing now?" Sousuke tilted his head, examining Kyouko's face.

"No… no… not at all…." Kyouko held up her hands, caught off guard somewhat. "Not me. Some _other_ girl." She took a deep breath, forced herself to calm down, then continued. "Have you… ehem…" The bespectacled girl had to clear her throat. Have you ever thought about going out on a date with a girl, Sousuke?"

_Perhaps a more direct question would pay off._

"I have been instructed to do so in the past. With Miss Inaba. It was **_not_** the most practical or mutually productive situation. I did as I was told, but was chastised most severely by Kaname." Sousuke looked perplexed. "She supported Mizuki and I in our deception. But, she did not instruct me to perform the touching of lips that I did."

Kaname broke yet another branch. Maya and Ryo rubbed their hands together. They had heard only cursory details about that incident, months in the past. No one had mentioned anything about a kiss.

As far as _they_ were concerned, this 'plan' was working out great.

"Oh. OK. I see. But, I'm talking about asking a girl out, because **_you_** want to." Kyouko chewed on the end of her hair for a moment. "Haven't you ever wanted to ask a girl out on a date?"

Kaname moved closer, taking up residence behind a lower squat shrub. Her heartbeat was racing faster and faster. Unawares, she was beginning to gather a fair number of her own observers.

"I…." Sousuke closed his mouth, and then looked down at his shoes. Noticing a smudge, he began buffing things to a brighter shine. "I do **_not_** fully understand such matters. And, with my situation…." He looked over at Kyouko. He cocked his head, taking on a curious look. "Why the sudden interest in _my_ personal habits?"

"Well, I…… you know…" Kyouko was flustered. That question snuck up and bit her. But, she reacted quickly, finding a good line of reasoning. "Sometimes you look lonely. It's nice to have someone you can share feelings with. Especially if the other students…… _you know_…… treat you differently…."

"Ah. Thank you." Sousuke stared at Kyouko for a moment, thinking. "Kaname is the only one who treats me kindly, as more than just a classmate. But, she often finds reasons why I am deficient and poorly suited for school life." His mouth tightened up some, and then relaxed. "Shinji also acts more friendly that the others. I have noticed that you do as well."

Kaname's hands opened and closed. She bit her lip. There was a slight catch in Sousuke's voice.

"It's almost time to head in," Kyouko said, feeling a sense of pressure. She doubted that anything she had said up to that point would be sufficient for Kaname's purposes. "I just want to say one more thing. When a girl acts differently than usual, it often means something important. It's important to pay attention, and figure out what she wants from you." She looked over to where she knew that Kaname was hiding. "Take today, for example…."

Finally aware that she was being watched, Kaname put the other students out of her mind. She felt very anxious. Kyouko had scored a very important point there. Maybe Sousuke would put two and two together.

"I see…." Sousuke gathered up his books. "I think I begin to see exactly what you mean…."

Kyouko smiled brightly. A sense of warmth began to fill her. It looked like she had succeeded.

Kaname's hands grasped the woody growth of the shrub tightly. Her scheme had worked. This could be a golden moment.

"That's _great, _Sousuke!" Kyouko nodded, a relieved expression on her face. She wouldn't be taken to task by Kaname, now.

"However…." Sousuke looked somewhat uncomfortable. "I may not be very knowledgeable about such matters…." He looked closely at the young girl's face. "And it may have been difficult for you to express your thoughts…."

"It's OK, Sousuke." Kyouko wondered what Sousuke was getting at.

"But, I think of you as a friend. I must admit that I have no wish to ask you out on a date. I apologize." He should have stopped there. "It has nothing to do with the things that those boys said about **_your _**posterior portion, or the fact that they said you were only cute in a nerdish sort of way."

Kyouko was stunned. Maya and Ryo gave each other high fives, amused by the turn of events. Kaname stood up, holding the shrub in her hands, its roots torn completely from the ground.

Sousuke saw her. "Ahhh. Kaname. Was this _your_ idea?" He paused for a moment. "I had had thought that perhaps you…" He swallowed hard, not comfortable with his train of thought.

Kaname dropped the bush. She looked at Sousuke, and then at the enormous crowd of people nearby. "Sousuke, I…." Kaname's surprise was soon overwhelmed by her disappointment. But, it was her anger that grew quickest of all.

"You are a good friend, Kaname." Sousuke nodded. "The strategy you selected for Miss Tokiwa was flawless. It would no doubt have led to mission success, had I shown any interest in her."

"Sousuke…… you…… _you_…." Kaname picked up the shrub, a huge ball of moist soil clinging around its roots. "**BAKA!**"

The plant sped towards Sousuke like a projectile, just as he had turned to look at Kyouko again. Dirt flew everywhere. Sousuke dropped his books. Kyouko wiped mulch and manure out of her eyes.

"**_Ooooooooooh_**…." Kaname was fuming.

"Kaname does _not_ take disappointment well," Sousuke said to Kyouko. "Your own behavior is very admirable, however." He looked up, and over at the crowd of students milling around. "Why are they laughing? Are they amused at your failure?"

"Yes. No, not really. Not _my_ failure." Kyouko sighed. "I wasn't talking about me, Sousuke. _Really." _

Sousuke shook his head, causing a fair amount of soil to fall to the ground. He took out his shirt tale, to allow the dirt inside his uniform to fall out. Looking at a blushing Kyouko, he cocked his head and spoke. "I understand. I will not shatter that illusion for you. It is difficult to face defeat."

_Kyouko just hung her head._

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The water was on, full force.

A stinging rain washed over Kaname, as she lathered up in the shower. That marked the third time that say she had bathed that day.

Scrubbing hard, she worked to remove plant sap and dirt. Most of all, she wished that she could wipe away her disappointment. That, and the embarrassment she now felt, seeing that so many people had watched her scheme unravel.

It must have been like Reality TV for them all.

"**Ooooooh**…… _damn him!"_

Slamming her hand against the shower tiles, Kaname grimaced. Despite that, she repeated her gesture, harder this time. It had been monumentally stupid, getting her hopes up like that. The whole class seemed to know how she felt about that loser.

But Sousuke remained as oblivious as possible.

_Really! _How could anyone be that clueless? Worse! How could someone who piloted the ARX-7… the only Lambda Driver A.S. on the side of all that was good and right… be _so_ blind? If the moron acted that way in battle, Kaname would have disappeared after her various kidnappings…… Tokyo and Hong Kong would be smoking ruins…… and the TDD-1 would be an apartment building for deep sea fishes!

"**Ahhhhhh**…… why do I even _bother?"_

It was a good question. Sousuke was cute, but there were better looking boys at Jindai High School. He was remarkably brave, but _that _got her into trouble as often as it removed her from harm's way. He was sweet in his own way, but that was ruined by so many idiosyncrasies and misinterpretations.

Was it merely gratitude, because he had saved her life on a number of occasions? Was it a sense of responsibility, since she had done the same for him? Was it because the two of them had each had their share of hard times in their lives?

Sometimes, it seemed to defy all logic. But, so did the fact that she was Whispered….

"**Huhhhhh**…… it doesn't really matter why, _does it?"_

Scowling, Kaname washed soap out of her eyes. Leaning her forehead against the cold tiles, she closed her eyes and thought back to past times with Sousuke. She tried to focus on the positive things, the memories that still had the power to make her smile. In her mind, she could hear him say that she was beautiful, the day that she had worn her mother's kimono.

She suddenly shivered. The water hadn't gone cold. She had seen a number of images that were at great contrast to those happier recollections. Naked as she was, she felt somewhat vulnerable. It was **_not_** a good time to think about Amalgam, and the things she had suffered because of them.

"He's certainly handy to have around!"

Her laughter echoed throughout the empty girls' locker room. Try as she might, her forced good humor couldn't erase a growing seed of fear inside her. Amalgam was bad enough. But, it was Sousuke and his Jindai mission that had her most concerned at that moment.

How much longer would the big jerk be around? Did it make any sense at all to let her heart be vulnerable for a lout like him? Hell, if things kept moving at this pace, she would never be able to tell him how she felt before he disappeared from her life forever.

The dreams she had about convincing him to leave Mithril were probably just that: dreams. Could he _ever_ grow to care so much about her, that he would throw away all that he knew? Was that even possible for someone who had been through the things that he had?

"I'm so useless…."

Her pride was standing in the way again. If it hadn't been, maybe she could have approached Sousuke and spoken to him forthright. It wouldn't be the end of the world if _she_ asked _him_ out, would it?

No. Not the end of the world. Not for someone like her. She was a fighter. She had to be.

Of course, there was more than pride at work here. Kaname's hand grasped the cold water knob and squeezed involuntarily. Deep inside, she was afraid. She did not want to be abandoned. But even more important, she did not want to be rejected.

If she asked Sousuke, he could hurt her deeply. He could say 'no'.

"Why doesn't he just want to ask me out on his own? Why? Is duty the only thing he thinks about? Does he think I'm some kind of freak? Hah! Like _he_should be the one to talk!"

No, Sousuke wasn't a complete automaton. Kaname had realized that much when he talked about Tessa, and how his attitude towards the ash-blonde girl had changed in recent months. There was a heart in there, alright. But, it probably had him as confused as it had her!

She doubted that he considered her a freak. If anything, he showed her more of himself than he showed anyone else. Would he do that to someone he considered freakish or abnormal? Probably not. But, even though she made it a point to help him in many ways, she wasn't the easiest person to be around.

Yes. She was back _there_ again: the honey versus vinegar conundrum. It wasn't entirely fair, though. Even if she were a Saint, she would have trouble keeping her temper around that big stupid head!

"Time to get back to class, girl."

Turning off the shower, Kaname walked over and took a clean fresh towel off of the linen shelf. Drying off, she considered her next options. It was not time to give up just yet. She remembered something that Sousuke had said outside.

_It might be time to take a slightly different tack._

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The room was packed.

Teenagers and young adults clustered around the game machines, pumped up by the flashing lights and loud special effects.

It seemed as if everyone was talking at once, as the noise level was well beyond phenomenal. As a result, Shinji found himself shouting, just to get Sousuke to hear what he was trying to say. He had convinced Sousuke to accompany him, at Kaname's insistence.

_She had not been subtle._

At first, the shy young man had been somewhat contrary. Sousuke was his friend…… and he loved playing video games…… but he _also_ had a passive-aggressive streak a mile wide. However, when Kaname and her posse of friends had made finely-veiled threats about his game systems, military magazines, and the Gundam models that he liked to bring to school, he decided it **_was_** a good night for gaming.

Of course, Sousuke had originally been dead set against joining him, as it would have meant leaving Kaname unaccompanied on her walk home.

Thinking ahead, Kaname had covered that part as well. Stretching the truth well beyond anything recognizable, she had told her protector that she would be in a school meeting for a number of hours after class. He might as well find something to do to pass the time.

She would find him at the arcade.

"**HEY, SOUSUKE! IT'S JUST LIKE I TOLD YOU! _MECH MANIA III_**."

Shinji looked like he was ready to faint. A garishly painted gaming booth sported wild representations of Arm Slaves. At the side of the two-seater booth, a large TV screen flashed up characteristics for the various A.S. systems appearing in the game.

"**LOOK! THEY ADDED THE CHINESE _MONG HU!_ OH MAN, THAT'S SO GREAT. AND THE ISRAELI _MERKAB! _I JUST READ ABOUT THOSE**. **_WICKED!_**"

Shinji clenched his hands into fists. He trembled, all the way from his eyelids down to his toes. One might have thought that he had just one the grand prize in a rather rich lottery.

Eyes riveted to the television screen, Sousuke frowned and shook his head.

"The statistics are greatly exaggerated. The Chinese A.S. is an evolutionary step, **_not_** a revolutionary one. And, the facts about the Israeli machine have been greatly inflated in speed and maneuverability, yet oddly downplayed in arms and ammunition capacity.

Shinji pointed to his ears.

"**WHAT?"**

Sousuke sighed. The series of interconnected rooms were louder than the flight bay of _Da_ _Danaan_ prior to Priority One launch preparations. But, in some way, the loud volume might make the game feel more like realistic combat for him. Or so he surmised.

"**I SAID THAT THE STATISTICS ARE DISTURBINGLY INNACURATE."**

His friend nodded his head, shrugged, and then smiled.

"**IT'S JUST A GAME. I GUESS THEY NEED TO EVEN THINGS OUT SOME. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT."**

That had Sousuke frowning. He realized that the game would be nothing like the training simulators that Mithril had for recruits, or like the actual M9s and Arbalest. But, he had hoped for _some_ kind of realism. Not to mention a challenge.

Watching the group of guys in front of them taking their turns, he scowled and forced himself to face the inevitable. This was not much different than the console-based games that Shinji played over lunch break at school.

Making certain not to be seen by Sousuke, Kaname narrowed her eyes when she saw what kind of game that Shinji had led Sousuke to. As if that big idiot didn't spend enough time gallivanting around in a suit of mechanized armor!

Shinji, who could accurately predict the wait until their turn based on the numbers of quarters up on the machine, decided to use the wait as an opportunity to carry out Kaname's 'request'.

"**HEY, SOUSUKE. DO YOU THINK THAT PLAYING GAMES LIKE THIS MAKES SOMEONE A GEEK?**"

Kaname nodded her head, and then frowned when some sweaty smelly kid brushed against her, trying to make his way through the growing crowd of patrons, the vast majority of whom were guys.

"**NEGATIVE.**"

Sousuke did not think in terms of Geek and non-Geek. Nobody qualified as the 'Beautiful People.' There was Friend and Foe. He knew very well what to do in _those_ circumstances.

Shinji grinned. Most people thought differently than his scar-faced friend.

"**OTHER PEOPLE PROBABLY THINK THAT, THOUGH. YOU'RE THE ONLY OTHER GUY I KNOW THAT DOESN"T GO ON DATES.**"

Kaname smiled. Shinji had identified the target area and was preparing for his initial sortie! **'**Target area'? 'Sortie'? She was thinking like Sousuke._"Oooooh!"_Slamming her hand against a game panel. She caused one boy to jump and miss his opportunity at a bonus round.

The looks that the boy gave her had her looking for a new place to stand.

"**DATING IS LIKELY OVERRATED. IT DOES NOT KEEP ONE FIT, FED, OR FREE.**"

Sousuke shrugged. He knew that people dated. At times, he stared at couples, wondering just what had them looking so content or happy. But, it didn't really matter. His life was not exactly one of joy and good fortune. He had a job to do.

The strange yearning that he felt at times was not too difficult to ignore.

Kaname stomped her foot, angered at Souske's offhand comment. Not paying attention to the people around her, she tripped a young man hurrying to make it to an open machine. Falling, the boy started a chain reaction. A number of people turned around, furious, their games ruined or seriously set back.

Everyone pointed at the boy. Eyes wide, he gave them all a pleading look, pointing over in Kaname's direction.

"**I THINK THERE IS MORE THAN THAT. IT MIGHT BE FUN TO GO ON DATES. IF IT'S WITH THE RIGHT PERSON. YOU KNOW, SOMEONE WHO LIKES YOU AND MAKES AN EFFORT TO GET YOUR ATTENTION.**"

Safe between two different machines, Kaname waited expectantly. For someone she had previously judged to be ineffectual, Shinji was making good progress. Given enough time, the bookish boy might be able to open Sousuke's eyes to her own efforts.

_And, it wasn't like things would turn out the way they did with Kyouko!_

Intent on watching, Kaname never realized that she in turn was being watched.

"**I CANNOT SAY THAT YOU ARE INCORRECT**…… **AS** **I HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF SUCH THINGS**…… **PERHAPS** **IF THINGS WERE DIFFERENT**…."

Sousuke ran his hand through his hair after shouting. For a brief moment, he pictured Kaname's face. But, the Mithril emblem rose up in the background, causing him to shake his head and dissolve the image.

Common teenage things did **_not _**factor into his life. The organization had never allowed him space to grow up like a normal youth, but expected him to fit in seamlessly with other teenagers. Yet, given all _that,_ the constraints of the mission didn't allow him full freedom to be a young adult, even if he knew what to do with such a boon.

Kaname hung her head. It was so frustrating. If Sousuke were totally devoid of feelings, she could eventually accept the situation and move on. But he **_did _**have something deep inside. She was certain of it. It made him a challenge.

It also made him somewhat like she had been, around the time that her mother had died.

Not too far behind her, Tsubaki Issei stood like a loon, his mouth open. He and the other members of the Karate Club had come to try out some of the new fighting games. Now, his buddies stood with amused or resigned looks on their faces.

"**YOU SHOULDN'T JUST GIVE UP HOPE. YOU'RE THE KIND OF PERSON WHO RUSHES AHEAD, NOT SOMEONE WHO** **HIDES**. **_RIGHT?_**"

Shinji was growing a little hoarse, but he had his task to perform. As he spoke loudly, he thought about his own life, and how Sousuke seemed to have a lot of the characteristics that he wished he himself could have.

But, there was a parallel between Sousuke and the best armed and best armored fighting vehicles in the world. None of the offensive or defensive potential would matter, if there is no engine, or no crew to man the machine.

His friend had a lot going for him, but seemed to be missing some crucial element.

"**THAT IS CORRECT**. **FOR CERTAIN THINGS**. **THINGS THAT I** **UNDERSTAND**. ** I DON'T THINK**…… **I DON'T THINK THERE IS** **ANYONE**…."

Kaname smacked kicked at something on the ground hard, her irritability growing exponentially. The item turned out to be the joined male and female ends of a power cord and an extension cord. As the coupling separated, the power on one of the most popular games went off.

Suddenly, like magic, the given vicinity went silent, as groups of video game enthusiasts looked on, stunned. The silence spread quickly, as whispered word spread from mouth to ear like wildfire.

"**BUT, THERE _IS_ SOMEONE AT THE SCHOOL THAT WANTS YOUR ATTENTION THAT** **WAY**."

Shinji had shouted by habit, even though there suddenly was no need. His voice carried across the whole room.

Kaname stood frozen, feeling terribly exposed. She wondered if Shinji would somehow forget her stipulation, naming her name. That would be embarrassing. Also, the silence soon gave way to angry muttering and generally discord.

A number of nasty comments revolved around 'that girl' and 'the one with the blue hair'.

A sea of disgruntled faces looked in Kaname's direction, seeing the disconnected power cord near her feet. The noise volume increased again.

"**YOU ARE SPEAKING OF MISS** **TOKIWA**…."

Sousuke thought back to his conversation with Kyouko. It had him feeling somewhat saddened, though he wasn't exactly certain why. The girl's affection for him was _not_ the issue. He had been surprised to see that Kaname had been trying to further the girl's cause.

Kaname closed her eyes and fought the urge to physically indulge her anger again. She didn't see Tsubaki slowly making his way through the crowd towards her.

"**NO. _NOT_ KYOUKO**. **THAT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING. SOMEONE** **_ELSE_** **IS ATTRACTED TO** **YOU**."

Kaname's eyes popped open. She crossed her fingers and whispered a short prayer. Sousuke had to make the connection this time. _He just had to!_

The young soldier stood ramrod stiff, his eyes lost in thought. He even put his hand to his forehead, concentrating harder and harder, despite the all-encompassing noise of the game facilities.

"**I THINK**…… **I THINK THAT I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO** **SAY**…."

Shinji smiled. It looked as if he had accomplished his mission. He would have nothing to fear from Kaname or any of her demonstrative friends.

"**_GREAT!_ I HAD HOPED THAT YOU WOULD**!"

Sousuke looked uncomfortable. Kaame on the other hand looked excited. Smoothing her clothing, she forced herself to take on a more dignified pose. When Sousuke mentioned her name, she would appear like a goddess out of nowhere. The moment would be perfect.

"**THIS PERSON**…… **HAS _THAT_ KIND OF FEELINGS TOWARDS ME**…… **THE KIND THAT ARE EXPRESSED BY DATING?**"

Sousuke tensed up some. For some reason, he looked disappointed, not pleased or intrigued. That had Kaname's elation quickly leaking away, like the air in a poorly-tied balloon.

She leaned over, and placed her forehead against one of the game booths. That had Tsubaki's face clouding over.

"**YES!**"

Shinji was practically gleeful. Jindai High School would _not_ become a Gundam-free zone.

"**I SEE**…… **THAT IS UNFORTUNATE**…… **I WILL DO MY BEST TO REMAIN** **YOUR FRIEND**…… **DESPITE THIS**…."

Kaname stood upright. Her mouth fell open. No. That big jerk couldn't have thought that….

Souske folded his arms over his chest, a disapproving look on his face.

"**_WH-WH-WH_-WHAT?**"

Shinji swallowed hard. What did Sousuke mean by that? Why would Kaname's interest in Sousuke impact the boy's friendship with him? Wait a minute. He couldn't _possibly _have misinterpreted the conversation to mean….

"**IN SEVERAL ISLAMIC NATIONS TODAY, A DEATH SENTENCE FOR HOMOSEXUALITY REMAINS ON THE STATUTE BOOKS."**

Shinji held up his hand and shook his head vehemently. His face had gone pale. It felt as if all of the blood in his body had leaked out through the soles of his feet.

A number of guys in the crowd all turned to look at the bespectacled boy. Some began talking loudly in their friends' ears.

Kaname shook her fist in Sousuke's direction. Tsubaki looked in that same direction, then scowled. _Sagara!_ His hated rival. What had he done to Kaname this time?

"**BUT**…… **BUT**…… **BUT**……"

Shinji was well aware of the stares aimed in his direction. He was no longer concerned about Kaname. His reputation was at stake.

"**HOWEVER, ONE MUST REALIZE THE EXISTENCE OF DIVERSITY. IN SOME ISLAMIC SOCIETIES, SAME SEX PRACTICES**……**INCLUDING ABUSE OF YOUNG BOYS BY OLDER MALE RELATIVES AND PROSTITUTION**…… **HAVE BEEN RAMPANT FROM THE MEDIEVAL TO THE MODERN PERIOD**."

Kaname took a few steps closer to Sousuke, her shoulders squared and her jaw set. She wished that she had remembered to bring her halisen. She was too wound up in her own disappointment to care whether or not Shinji was unfairly tarnished at her behest.

Shinji, on the other hand, was near frantic.

"**I'M NOT LIKE _THAT_ SOUSUKE! I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT ME!**"

Sousuke's eyes went hard momentarily. He thought back to his youth, when he was in Afghanistan. While he had been fortunate to escape abuse…… killing his first man in just such a situation…… he had witnessed more than he cared to. He pictured things that he had otherwise banished from his memory.

He knew that Shinji was not someone who was likely to force himself on children. But, for the briefest of instants, the look he turned on his friend had the other boy weak in the knees.

It didn't help matters that Sousuke had his hand wrapped around his trusty Glock, partially exposed in his pocket.

"**MUJAHAIDEEN COMMANDERS… THOSE THAT REBELLED AGAINST PARTY LEADERSHIP… LOOTED AND PLUNDERED THEIR IMPOVERISHED COUNTRYMEN. HOMOSEXUALITY ALSO RAN RAMPANT AMONGST SUCH MEN, SOME OF WHOM WENT TO THE EXTREME OF MARRYING YOUNG BOYS, IN SOME CASES BY FORCE."**

The gun slid a slight bit more out of Sousuke's pocket, and then disappeared from view entirely.

Shinji had a sudden urge to run to the restroom.

"**THEY WOULD BREAK INTO HOMES FOR THE PURPOSE OF ROBBERY AND RAPE, AND IF THEY WERE SHOT IN THE PROCESS, THE HOME WOULD BE BURNED TO THE GROUND."**

Kaname was too frustrated to be moved by Sousuke's revelation. She didn't even stop to wonder whether or not _he_ had been one of the young boys that had been taken advantage of in such a situation.

"Damn you, Sousuke! Why am I here? How could you do this to me…… _again?"_

His keen ears picking Kaname's voice out of the crowd, Tsubaki signaled his comrades to encircle Sousuke. His eyes narrowed, and his jaw set, he began gathering up his chi, preparing for a long overdue confrontation with the scar-faced boy.

Shinji shouted as loudly as he could:

"**I'M _NOT_ GAY!**"

The usually quiet boy was surprised to find that he was enraged, and that his hands were curved into claws. His heart pounded in his chest, and his breathing was ragged.

"**I AM NOT THE ONE INTERESTED IN YOU**. **IT'S**…."

His disclosure never took place.

"**_SOUSUKE!"_**

Marching forward, Kaname stumbled over more power cords, causing some machines to go totally black, while some merely flickered on and off without much interruption in play.

The rabid gaming crowd had suffered enough. They began shouting at Kaname, using words that few people would risk putting in print. Some made obscene gestures, while others shook their fists in her direction.

The irate girl was oblivious to it all. Her eyes were riveted on Sousuke.

The young Mithril operative was surprised by Kaname's timing, remembering what she had told him earlier. But, he could not focus on that He recognized the Karate Club members in the crowd, and correctly surmised that their leader was somewhere nearby.

An angry mob of young men were headed in Kaname's direction.

Shinji was red in the face.

"**SOUSUKE! YOU TOTAL MORON! YOU BIG JERK!"**

Kaname raised her hand, but let it fall limp to her side. Her sadness and disappointment diluted her anger. She put her chin against her chest, feeling as if the whole world was spinning around her then.

"**_SAGARA!_ YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD! COWARD OF THE WORST KIND! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO KANAME!"**

Suddenly, all Hell broke loose.

The burly karate trainees all rushed at Sousuke, intending to corral him for their leader. Tsubaki approached Kaname, trying to tell her in a stammering voice that he was there for her. The angry crowd moved in tighter, stunned by the unfolding spectacle.

Shinji, wisest of all, pushed his way against the current of bodies, headed for the exit, his job done. He was realistic. There was nothing he could do to help Sousuke. After dropping some coins in a payphone, he called the authorities and headed home.

He would find out what happened at school the next day. But, knowing Sousuke, he would be certain to watch the evening news.

"**KANAME. GET DOWN!"**

Sousuke's voice had Kaname complying immediately. In most similar situations, she would have confronted him, taking offense at his ordering her around. But, that precise tone in his voice had an immediate effect.

Almost feeling as if things were happening in slow motion, she watched as a stun grenade bounced past her, into the midst of the angry crowd that she became all too aware of. The detonation knocked dozens of teenagers to the ground.

Tsubaki prepared to leap. He shouted:

"**I HAVE YOU!**"

The attack occurred with astounding speed. Were the kick to have connected, Sousuke would have been in a world of hurt. As it was, however, he aimed his pistol at the enraged boy's groin area and fired. The bullet hit the irate martial artist betwixt wind and water, causing him to grimace as he soared over his ducking adversary.

"**INCORRECT!**"

Tsubaki landed hard on a gaming booth, breaking its bolts free from the floor. The machine fell over in a shower of sparks. Fragments of glass skittered across the carpeting.

Kaname began making her way towards the exit, feeling numb. She paid little heed to the moaning and writhing boys spread out along her path. They were in too much agony to care about_ her_ any more.

She never saw Sousuke deal with the larger less talented Karate Club members, who all ended up destroying one machine or another. When Sousuke hurried to her side, she put her hands at her hips and tried to glare at him.

She didn't have the energy.

"**KANAME. YOU ARE SAFE NOW. WE SHOULD LEAVE BEFORE THINGS BECOME UGLY.**"

Kaname didn't answer him. She just turned and walked outside, glad to be able to hear herself think.

"Kaname?"

Sousuke looked concerned. He wondered if Kaname had been injured in some fashion. He wanted to remove her from the premises as quickly as possible, even though the mob's ire had been transferred to Tsubaki Issei and his compatriots.

"Just leave me alone, Sousuke. You are such an _idiot_. I can't deal with that any more."

As Kaname walked off down the boulevard, Sousuke followed at his customary distance. Checking behind him, he made certain that they were not being followed. He had completely forgotten about Shinji.

"Don't follow me, Sousuke. Not now. Maybe never again." Her voice was remarkably flat. "Just…… leave…… me…… alone."

The young soldier stopped. He knew what his duty entailed. He should follow her no matter what she said, and regardless of how she acted. Her safety was paramount. But, there had been something in her voice.

"You really **_are_** an idiot, do you know that?"

It was a familiar voice. An adult voice. But, the brief glimpse that Sousuke got of the speaker suggested a teenaged boy in the usual type of adolescent apparel. That 'boy' had somehow vanished into thin air.

"**_I_** will keep an eye on her. It has been amusing to watch your stupidity."

That voice. Yes. _It was Wraith!_ What did the Intelligence operative mean about his stupidity? In what way had he been an idiot?

As the confused soldier headed off towards his own domicile, flashing red and blue lights painted the fronts and sides of buildings, as police units converged on the gaming den.

Voices called out through megaphones. But, Sousuke could hardly hear what was said. The sound of his heartbeat was loud in his ears.

_He had some thinking to do._


	3. three

The alarm was growing ever more insistent.

Louder and louder the strident signal rang out, causing Kaname to hold her pillow tightly over her ears.

She was **_not_** going to school today. With the way that she was feeling, there was little chance that she would be going _anywhere_ today. Any person or persons showing up at her door would be ignored completely.

For some unknown length of time, she simply lay in bed, trying not to think about the previous day. She didn't care if she got into trouble at school. It was unlikely that she would, since she was such a good and honest student. If she told her teachers that she had been ill, they would think nothing of it.

Kyouko might guess the truth. Shinji too, given the events of the last evening. But, she didn't want to think about either of _them. _That would just get her to thinking about Sousuke.

Too late.

Now she was done for.

No doubt that clueless idiot would be the only thing she could think about for the rest of the day. Great! Just great! When it came down to it, he was the _last_person on earth that she wanted to think about.

"Stupid jerk." She closed her eyes, squeezing out fresh tears. "Stupid… stupid… stupid… stupid…"

What was more stupid? Sousuke, because he was so different than every other boy in existence? Or her, because she had hoped to make him something that he was not?

How could anyone have missed her hints on the way to school? How could anyone, having heard all that, go on to misinterpret Kyouko's comments? How could anyone make the same mistake twice, the second time with a boy?

"How could I have hoped for anything different?"

Laying on her back, Bonta-Kun doll clutched tightly to her breast, Kaname stared up at the ceiling, frowning when she noticed a few whispy cobwebs. Feeling melancholy, she wondered just how she had come to find herself in her current predicament. She thought back to the day that she had first seen Sousuke, when he had stopped by the teacher. She had wondered just what kind of freak he was, after Miss Kagurazaka pulled what she thought was a toy gun out of his book bag.

Toy gun. Sure. Little did she know.

After that, a whole chorus of memories sang out for attention. Her bust for art class lay in the trash can. Souske tackled the teacher. The look on the jerk's face when he walked into the girls' locker room. The rage that she had felt when she realized where his hand had been, shortly after he had pushed her out of the path of that truck. Sousuke on her balcony, holding her panties. Gauron. The staged date with Mizuki. Tessa in a towel. Behemoth. That damn security gate. Her disappointment on finding out the true reason that he had asked her to an island. That damned Bonta-Kun suit. Pony Man and Officer Wakana. The amazing transformation of the Rugby Club. A janitor's crazed spree with a chainsaw. Her trip to Hong Kong.

_So many things._

"_Gee. _I've been **_so_** fortunate!"

Her sarcasm fell on deaf ears. The Bonta-Kun doll was not impressed. Neither were the pictures of her mother and family.

The truth of the matter was, many of those memories were special to her now. _Why? _The answer was easy.

_Sousuke._

It was her own fault, in retrospect. What other girl could possibly have fallen for a complete cipher like him? After all of the things she had been forced to deal with in her life, maybe her subconscious mind had some need to set her up for more of the same.

Maybe.

But, that didn't explain the aching she felt in her heart.

It had been a hopeless endeavor, attempting to get any sleep after she got home last night. Accordingly, she had spent a lot of time thinking. The conclusion she came up with did not sit well with her at all; but, it _was_ probably best for her in the long run.

_There was no sense putting any hope whatsoever in Sousuke. _

Why should she want to? Why subject herself to that kind of life? She thought back to her time aboard the cruise ship, when she and Sousuke were trying to deal with the damn robots. Even then, realizing that she truly loved him, she mourned the fact that her seventeenth Christmas Eve had been spent in such an insane fashion.

Her cell phone rang. Out of curiosity, she picked it up and checked the caller I.D., even though she had no intention of answering it. It was Kyouko's cell phone number. No doubt she was worried about her.

Should she her friend, to reassure her? No. At least not nowShe just didn't feel up to it.

Pulling the cover up over her chin, Kaname nibbled on it a moment, before stopping herself. She was surprised that Sousuke hadn't called. For a brief moment, her eyes narrowed. She wondered if he might have a small digital camera hidden somewhere in her room.

If he didn't maybe Mao or that pervert Weber did!

"_**Ooooooh!**"_

If Mithril had invaded her privacy in that manner, they would pay! After Sousuke did! But, it was unlikely that any such device could be hidden anywhere. _Right? _Wraith would have told her if there was one, wouldn't he have?

_Unless he had done so himself!_

Kaname clenched her teeth. She often walked around her bedroom naked, after getting out of the shower and toweling off, and before she got dressed in the morning. She forced herself to relax by degrees. She was being unduly paranoid.

In a way, she was feeling betrayed. Even though she didn't want to see Sousuke at the moment, he should have checked up on her. It was possible that the big idiot had guessed that she was too upset to come to school. But, how could he be certain that Amalgam hadn't struck again?

"Jerk!"

For a moment, she considered the flipside. What if something had happened to Sousuke? She sat upright, her face intense. Worrying at her hair, she lay back down. Why should she be concerned about that loser?

What if he was attacked again by Tsubaki and his gang… overwhelmed by that angry mob… or taken to jail by the police? He deserved it, didn't he? _Yes! _Maybe he reported everything that happened to that Kalinin guy, or to Tessa. They might have removed him from the mission. Her life would be better that way, wouldn't it?

_Who was she fooling?_

"I hate this!" She put her hand to her head. "I hate it… I hate it… I hate it…."

There was a banging at the front door She sat up again, biting her lip. It sounded like Sousuke's knock. What should she do? She felt her anger rising, and didn't feel like dealing with that insensitive ignorant imbecile.

If she answered the door, and sent him on his way, she would be done with him. After that, he could do or say as he pleased, as long as he left her to her misery. That was what she should do. The problem was, she didn't want to talk to him at all.

But, if she didn't open the door, what then? Could that big idiot think that she might be injured or held captive? Might he be concerned that she had been kidnapped?

No. If something terrible had happened, Wraith would know. No doubt the mysterious agent would place an urgent report in that kind of situation, and that would lead to Sousuke receiving the pertinent information through the proper channels.

Besides, if he truly suspected trouble, he probably wouldn't knock. No doubt he would kicked the door down instead.

Laying back down, Kaname pulled the blanket up over her head. She would ignore him. He would knock a few more times, and then head off on his way. If he was in a rush… or in a bad mood… he might shout out to Wraith again, figuratively tying the Intelligence agent's underwear in knots.

She smiled, thinking of that. The smile quickly vanished.

"Kaname?"

Yes. That voice at the door was Sousuke's voice. He called out a number of times more, knocking each time. Kaname felt somewhat relieved that he had showed up, and that he was being persistent. But, she really hoped that he would go away.

There was a sound.

It was hard to make out. It came from the direction of the door. Was he going to come in anyway? He couldn't! Not with her dressed like this!

Before Kaname could get out of bed, she heard the sound of the door lock disengaging. Sousuke must have used some kind of lock pick! Taking too much time debating whether she should stay under the cover or make a mad dash to the bathroom, she lost all chance at making a choice.

"Kaname?"

Clenching her fists, Kaname saw red. That big idiot! Breaking and entering? The reason didn't matter….

"**SOUSUKE! YOU GET OUT OF MY APARTMENT. _NOW!_**"

Kaname didn't care if the neighbors overheard her. Maybe it would be good if they _did. _One of them might call the manager, or put in an emergency call to the police.

Sousuke's footsteps headed towards her room, not away. "Chidori! If you can speak, are you being held captive?"

"**NO, YOU MORON! I AM SITTING IN MY BED IN MY PAJAMAS! AND YOU ARE INTRUDING ON MY PRIVACY. GET OUT!"**

Kaname swallowed hard. She had been so depressed the night before, that she had simply slipped on her pajama top and bottom, without putting on any undergarments. For a moment, she almost felt as if she were completely naked under her blanket.

"If there is a captor, he could be forcing you to say that. I will leave once I am certain that you are _not_ under duress."

Sousuke held a small mirror into Kaname's room, attached to the end of a slim metal rod. The mirror turned this way and that. After a few moments, Sousuke peeked in around the frame of Kaname's door.

"**DURESS? _DURESS!_ OF COURSE I'M UNDER DURESS." **Kaname let go of the blanket she had pulled up under her chin, so she could shake a fist at her unwanted visitor.** "THERE'S A BIG STUPID JERK STARING AT ME WHEN I'M UNDER _DRESSED._**_"_

Kaname threw a pillow at Sousuke. That was followed by more pillows, and the Bonta-Kun doll. Soon, the alarm clock was speeding towards Sousuke's head.

"**PERVERT!**"

A lamp followed after the alarm clock. Sousuke quickly backed away from the door.

"Uhhh…… I take it you are indeed here alone. Ummm…… I will be leaving now. Errr…I just wanted to make certain that you were safe…."

Kaname put down the drawer she had slid out of her nightstand. He looked over at the door, her feelings mixed. "Alright. Just leave, OK? And make certain that you lock the front door!"

"Affirmative," Sousuke sounded both relieved and unhappy. "And, I am sorry. Not about the intrusion. That was necessary. I apologize for being so stupid…." His head disappeared from view. His footsteps indicated that he was heading back to the front door. His final comment had Kaname's eyes going wide.

Just what was Sousuke trying to say?

"**SOUSUKE! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING?**"

Kaname listened. The front door did not open. But, Sousuke's footsteps hadn't changed course. He was obviously standing still, puzzled.

"_**Well?**"_

"Kaname?"

The girl slapped her hand down against her bedspread. "Who _else_ would it be, you moron?"

"Uhhh….I meant…"

Kaname couldn't help but grin. It was good to confuse Sousuke. He deserved it. It was the least that she could do.

"**_Idiot!" _**Kaname couldn't believe that her mood was changing**_. "_**You better explain yourself, before I change my mind and call the police or something."

Sousuke began walking again. Kaname expected him to stop just outside of her bedroom door. Instead, he stood directly in the doorway, looking over at her. She looked down. The blanket lay clumped around her waist.

"Uhhh…." Sousuke stared for a moment, and then swallowed hard. His gaze switched over to the ceiling. He found the same cobweb.

Kaname felt her face going warm. Just what had Sousuke been looking at? _No! _She didn't want to know. Then again. "Sergeant Sagara! You aren't blushing, **_are _**you? There had better be no reason for _that!"_

"Uhhh…." The young soldier stood straighter, but could not bring himself to look at Kaname, even though she had pulled the blanket up over her pajama top.

"Sousuke!" Kaname's eyes flashed. She had asked a question. The big stupid head had better answer!

"It…… well…." Sousuke was sweating.

"**_SOUSUKE!_**"

"It is not a problem….. you see…… I merely…." Sousuke swallowed hard again. "It was involuntary…… the way that your garments hung…… the localized tenting of the fabric…."

It was Kaname's turn to be perplexed. She was too tired to be able to adequately translate Sousuke-ese. "What are you trying to say, Sousuke?"

"Uhhh…… …… the answer would serve no recognizable purpose…." Sousuke took a step back.

"**Oooooo-oo-oo-ooh…"**

Sousuke blinked rapidly. Sighing, he spoke again. "For a moment, I found myself noticing that you…… uhhh…… were not wearing…… ummm…… you know……"

Kaname swallowed hard. She should probably let things stop right there! But, she was in a very contrary mood. "A bra, Sousuke?"

Sousuke nodded.

Kaname closed her eyes. Her upper lip curled. While part of her was glad that he had shown the inclination to look, most of her was royally pissed off. "Get…… out…… of…… my…… bedroom…… you jerk!" Still wanting him to tell her how he was feeling, she clarified matters. "Wait in the living room while I get dressed!"

"By your command, Kaname."

"**_GO!_**"

Fifteen minutes later, Kaname and Sousuke were standing in the largest room of her apartment, staring at one another. She had thrown on the first clothes she had come across. By coincidence, it was one of the outfits she had left out from the other morning. Her mood was definitely different than it had been at that time. But, at least she felt as if things were normalizing… whatever that word meant where she and a certain soldier were concerned.

"OK, Sousuke. You were telling me how stupid you were. We both know that. Hopefully, there's more to it than a useless confession. _Hmmmpppfff!"_ Kaname sounded tough, but at that moment felt strangely vulnerable. She might be the stupid one, getting her hopes up.

But, she couldn't help herself.

"It…… I…… affirmative." Sousuke looked down at his feet, obviously struggling with some concept. "Shinji was not interested in me in…… uhhh…… that way."

"And?" Kaname began tapping her foot.

"Kyouko was also not interested in me as a boyfriend." Sousuke's voice grew more confident.

"OK. _And?" _Kaname's began tapping one hand against her hip. If he messed up this time, she would throw him off of her balcony, or jump herself.

"Yesterday morning, you made efforts to dress very nicely." Sousuke looked at the clothing that Kaname now had on. He swallowed hard when she involuntarily struck a pose. "It seems that you also tried to get me to see certain facts while we walked to school."

"Yes," Kaname said. "And yes. _So-o-o-o-o_…." She tossed her hair nervously, taking a half step forward. Realizing what she had done, she wrinkled up her nose and walked over to look out of her window.

"Well……uhhh…." Sousuke walked over to look out of a different window. Catching a brief reflection of light, he began reaching for his gun. He fought down the urge to throw Kaname to the ground.

Could that have been Wraith?

"What's more important, Sousuke?" Kaname looked over at him. "Something outside, or something in _here?"_

"Kaname? Did you notice a flash of light on top of the other building?" Even before Kaname growled, Sousuke realize his mistake. "I apologize. That is not important. Well, that is not exactly true; but…."

"**_SOUSUKE!"_**

Kaname tried to calm herself down. This was the worst possible time to fly off of the handle. Sousuke was trying to say something. If it didn't come out in the fashion that she wanted, she would just have to be patient. "This doesn't have to be like pulling teeth, _does_ it Sousuke?"

Sousuke rubbed the back of his neck, the look on his face clearly indicating that he was perplexed. "Teeth, Kaname?"

"**Ahhhhhhhh!"** Kaname couldn't help herself. "**_Teeth, _Sousuke_…_**_"_ She was trembling noticeably. "As in what you stand to lose…."

There was a knock at Kaname's door.

"Miss Chidori…… are you alright, Miss Chidori…." It was her next door neighbor, a kindly old woman who lived alone with her cats.

"Yes! I'm fine Miss Shikomi. Thank you!" After Kaname said that, she crossed her arms over her chest and looked at Sousuke. She swallowed the words that would have blamed him for worrying a poor old retiree.

"Those facts that you tried to get me to see……. they…… it didn't…… I probably should have…." Sousuke ran his hand across his forehead, pushing his hair to the side. "I could not make the connection…… someone thinking about mein that manner." He blinked repeatedly. "Even though you have been more kind and affectionate towards me lately…… and Captain Testarossa has made efforts to…."

Kaname's face clouded up immediately. The mention of Tessa certainly didn't help. "_Really? _I ask Kyouko to try and get you to see the obvious, and you end up thinking that she was thinking that way about you." She had her hands on her hips. She looked incredulous. "I mean, _come on!_ I blackmailed Shinji into making an attempt, and you think that he…." She looked down at her feet.

Sousuke, for his part, looked somewhat sheepish. Many times, he saw certain things as being possible, because he had seen so many strange and unusual things in his life. But, he had also spent so little time in the social arena, that he jumped to conclusions that no one else would ever consider.

"That was really stupid, Sousuke…… thinking that another boy…… you know…." She looked up at him, feeling very vulnerable at the moment. "You thought that way about them…" Her eyes filled with tears. "Why not me?"

"Uhhh…… well…." Sousuke looked very uncomfortable. He felt somewhat skittish, like an animal that hears gunshots off in the distance.

"Is it…… is it because of the way I treat you sometimes. _You know_. When I boss you around, or get upset with you." Kaname clasped her hands together. "Or…… or is it because….. is it because you wouldn't want **_me_** to feel that way about you?" For some reason, she felt the weight of past years pressing down upon her.

She found herself thinking back to the way she had felt in Junior High.

"Kaname, my errors with Shinji and Kyouko were in part due to the cumulative effect of the statements that I had heard throughout the day, starting with the things that you had said." Sousuke felt cold inside, hearing the discomfort in Kaname's voice. "That, and the fact that I was rash in my assumptions."

"So? What else is new?" Kaname sat down on her couch, running her hand along the hem of her skirt. That was not the heartfelt disavowal that she had hoped for.

"I apologize," Sousuke said, walking over to the window again. He spoke, watching the cars pass by on the street below. "My inadequacy as a person causes people a great number of hardships." His eyes took on a faraway look. "If I had no value as a soldier, I suppose I would have nothing to offer anyone." He had been uncharacteristically introspective after seeing Kaname's reaction at the gaming parlor.

Kaname looked up. She wanted to say something to reassure Sousuke, but felt it was best to let him speak. This wasn't the first time that he had expressed some doubt about himself. But, it was the first time he had done so after realizing how Kaname felt about him.

"I'm assigned to take care of you, Kaname." Sousuke spoke quietly. "But, if you were to ask Wraith, he would say that I do a terrible job." That had Sousuke looking out at the opposite building again. "Still, I try my best. I think that you know that."

Kaname remained silent, but nodded her head.

"But…… uhhh…… I cannot allow myself to…." Sousuke clenched his one hand into a fist. Kaname noticed, leaning more towards the troubled young man. "The feelings I have…… they leave me confused…… I cannot afford to think them through." He closed his eyes. "I might…."

"You might realize that you care for me? Not just as a friend?" Kaname looked up at his face. She was disappointed when Sousuke turned away.

The young operative didn't answer.

"Sousuke?" Kaname stood up, and took a tentative step in his direction. Shaking her head, she sat back down.

"Affirmative."

That word should have had Kaname on her feet, clicking her heels together. Instead, she somehow felt saddened. There had been no enthusiasm whatsoever in Sousuke's response. "Is that so awful, Sousuke?"

"Yes," Sousuke answered. "No." He put his hand up to his brow. "I am caught between two rocks…." He banged one fist against the glass, showing a rare burst of emotion. "My life would have been easier if they had simply left me on the submarine."

This time, Kaname did stand up. She tried to shake off her malaise, realizing that Sousuke might be even more conflicted than she was. It was hard to believe that was possible. One thing was certain, however. She would never want to trade places with him, not even for a moment.

She remembered a time aboard the TDD-1 when she had offered him words of encouragement, only to have him lash out and say things that were hurtful to her. Even so, he had risked his life to rescue her, and the two of them had worked together to save the amazing undersea craft. She would see if she could do a better job of reaching him this time. "Sometimes, things are very hard, Sousuke. I can surely speak to that. You can, too."

Kaname began walking slowly towards the disconsolate young soldier. When she was inches away, she softly placed her hand on his shoulder. Her mouth fell open, when she realized that he was shivering.

"Yes." Sousuke's answer was nearly impossible to hear.

"But…… if someone works hard enough…… if they give something everything they have…… things can turn out better than they would ever imagine." Kaname brought her hand back down. "That happened to me, when I moved up to High School."

"I understand. You have told me the stories." Sousuke spun slowly, still unable to look Kaname in the eyes. "But, that was possible for you. I lack similar luxury."

Kaname's eyes widened, then immediately narrowed. She felt a tightness in her chest and a sudden burning in her belly.

"**Crap!**"

Sousuke actually jumped ever so slightly. He stared at Kaname, as if seeing her for the first time.

"K-K-Kaname?"

"I said 'crap', Sousuke. That's what it is. _Crap!"_ If Kaname were one to spit, she would have spat then and there. First, because she felt a growing anger in her belly. Second, because she didn't like the sound of that word on her lips.

"I don't…."

"**OF _COURSE_ NOT!** " Her anger built up even further. "It's always 'don't' or 'can't' or 'I fail to understand' with you, isn't it?" Her eyes flashed. Color came to her cheeks. "That's not just clueless, Sousuke. It's cowardice." She poked him in the chest with her fingernail. "I…… thought…… better…… of…… you…." She shook her head. "Why do I even bother?"

"Kaname…… what…."

"**_Oooooooooh!" _**Kaname fought the urge to shake Sousuke until his neck snapped. "You have to open your eyes, Sousuke. You have to take the time to think, sometimes. It's real easy to say you have no choice, and to follow the same old routine. I know. I've _been_ there. And I don't want to go back there again!" Tears began streaming down her face.

Before either of them knew it, she began sobbing.

"I don't…." Sousuke tensed up, hearing those exact words. He was shocked, when Kaname began banging her fists against his chest. "I'm sorry, I can't…." He had done it again. Kaname was right. It came so easily. "I will try."

Kaname kept sobbing, but her hands grabbed the fabric of his shirt. She placed her forehead against his chest. Sousuke didn't know what to do. He stared at his hands, and then down at the hair on Kaname's head. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and placed his hands on her back.

The two of them stood like that for a while, even after Kaname's sobbing ceased. She made no effort to wrap her arms around him, and he still held her as if she were made of the most fragile China.

"I would have thought that you would have figured things out sooner," Kaname said, her voice terribly muffled. "Especially after the last time we stood like this, just after you returned to school after leaving without telling me."

""I…… well…."

"Especially since a certain girl forced a Mithril Intelligence agent to take her with him and find you in Hong Kong!" Kaname leaned back, put her hands on Sousuke's shoulders, and shook him lightly.

"I was feeling…… at that time things were…."

"**Ohhh!"** Kaname shook Sousuke hard, frowning. "You really are an idiot, aren't you! And a moron! And a jerk!" She let go of him. "How could anyone be so stupid, as to miss the fact that the girl must care a great deal about him?" In a voice that Sousuke couldn't hear, she added "And is in love with him."

"But Kaname," Sousuke tilted his head, reflecting back on the day that Kaname referenced. It was the day that she had helped him accept his role with Arbalest, rediscover his will to fight, and spurred him to go on and make easy work of a group of Venom Arm Slaves. "When you gave reason for seeking me out…… you said it was to keep me from failing out of school…."

"**Ahhh!"** Kaname kicked Sousuke in the shin, hard. Then, she immediately became contrite. That past encounter had not been her finest hour. Wanting to admit her feelings for him, she had chickened out when it mattered most. "I'm sorry, Sousuke. I guess you just have a way with women." She tried to smile. "You're too clueless, right? And I'm too proud sometimes, unwilling to admit my mistakes. And when I'm not being too arrogant, I'm sometimes scared…."

"That hurt, Kaname."

"Oh really? Is **_that_** what you want to say to me at a moment like this?" Kaname's eyes narrowed. Her fake smile showed a lot of teeth.

"Uhhh…… negative…… it is not." He looked down at the large wet spots on his shirt, caused by Kaname's tears. "It seems that you wish for me to care about you. But that…… I am inexperienced at that kind of thing…… and it would compromise my mission…."

"If there was no mission, what would you want?" Kaname tried to remain under control. Now was not the time to vent about duty and obligation.

"Kaname, if there was no mission, I would not have _been_ here."

"**I**…… **CAN'T** ….. **TAKE IT**…… **ANYMORE**…." Kaname had to struggle with herself, to keep from kicking Sousuke repeatedly. She was only partially successful, landing one solid kick that had her companion wincing.

"If there was no mission…… and I was here in school with you……" Sousuke thought a moment. He would make an attempt at levity. Other people seemed able to use that method to diffuse emotional situations. "I would like you to refrain from kicking me."

"Sorry," Kaname said, looking a bit sheepish. "I still think you deserve it," she added defiantly. But, her arrogance quickly extinguished herself, when she wondered just how that kind of reaction affected Sousuke. "Does my kicking you…."

"Kaname?"

"I mean…… I'm pretty rough on you some times and…" Kaname frowned. "And you changed the subject again!"

"Uhhh…" Sousuke could spare a small admission. It would not serve as a commitment. "I would rather have you kicking me than anyone else." That simple truth had Sousuke beginning to sweat some. He watched the change in Kaname's face with some degree of curiosity. "If there was no mission…… and you did not abuse me too often…." He swallowed hard again. This was more difficult than anything he had to face professionally for a good while.

"Yes?" Kaname's fingers fluttered ever so slightly.

"I do not know the right words for it." Sousuke scratched his head. "But, I would like to stay by your side, Kaname. It is where I feel the best…… I think…… when I am not in the middle of combat." He nodded his head. "It may actually be more dangerous than combat, however."

Kaname smiled. Not because Sousuke was attempting to use humor. That was indeed miraculous in its own right. But, he had obviously been honest in his confession. Confused, but honest.

"It's only dangerous when you disappoint me," she said, a few happy tears dotting her lashes. "Or when I'm really upset. But that doesn't happen all that often, _right?" _She gave him a pointed look.

"If I answer truthfully, will you kick me again?" Sousuke looked down at Kaname's feet.

"No," Kaname said, fluffing her hair. "My feet hurt."

"I see. In any case, I think you are aware of your behavior, Kaname." It was Sousuke's time to look stern. "But the fact remains that my wishes are _not_ very important. I am a soldier. I have been given a mission. While Lt. Commander Kalinin seems proud of me when I stand up for myself, I do not think I have much room for self-gratification."

"But…." Kaname felt that sinking feeling in her belly again.

"It is best that I do not allow myself to be…… distracted…." Sousuke looked somewhat resigned to his fate. "Were I to grow too close……" He began sweating again. "For example… if I were to ask you out on a… uhhh… date… I would compromise my ability to protect you."

"**BULLSHIT!"**

It would be difficult to determine who was more shocked, Kaname or Sousuke. The word had simply exploded from Kaname's lips, despite the fact that she almost never swore.

"Kaname…."

"Sousuke, your stupid paranoia and impulsive behavior are what usually get us in trouble!" Kaname stomped her foot, suddenly looking like an irate fish-wife. "It's your fighting skills and physical reactions that save the day." She exhaled a long deep breath, and then made an effort to regain her composure. "Besides, the more time you spend close to me, the safer I would be…… right?"

"Uhhh…. There _is_ some logic to that…… but…."

"And, if you grow to care more deeply about me, you will be even **_more _**inclined to keep me safe, right?" Kaname struck a pose. For a moment, she felt like she had made a triumphant point. Sousuke would have to bow down before that logic! Right?

"That would be correct," Sousuke admitted, hand behind his head. "But, I would then have _two_ loyalties. That kind of relationship might very well conflict with my duties as a soldier."

"Duty!" Kaname threw her hands up. "How I _hate_ that word. I hate it Sousuke. I really do!" She furrowed her brow and shook a finger at him. "Is that all you ever want in your life? Duty?_"_

"I do not think so…… but…." Sousuke had wrestled with that subject a number of times. He had offered his resignation to the head of Intelligence at Mithril after the Hong Kong mission. Instead of leaving the organization, he had resumed his mission at half pay, not feeling he should be recompensed for his time at Jindai, as he had made the decision to go back to school for his own benefit.

"These are the best years of our lives, Sousuke." Kaname's look was almost pleading. "I don't want to wake up one day and realize that I had wasted these days. Can't you understand what I'm trying to say?" She walked over close to him again, tempted to lean up against him and burrow her head under his shoulder. "You deserve some happiness too! You really do!I shouldn't be the only one who cares about that. You should care about it too!"

"I don't know if…."

"**Ahhh-h-h-h!"** Kaname screamed, wanting to let all of the frustration out. Afterwards, she bit off her words one at a time. "You…… make…… this…… so…… hard…." Kaname put her finger on Sousuke's nose. "You mean so much to me, Sousuke. You really do. I want you to understand that, if nothing else." Kaname's eyes were intense. "Don't I mean a lot to you, too?"

Sousuke reached up and moved Kaname's finger. "Yes." He held the finger in his hand, looking down at it with a worried look. "It is a problem."

"Only if you let it be, Sousuke." Kaname leaned into him, sighing. "You _do_ have choices, right? We both do. I think I know what's bothering you."

"Kaname?" Sousuke didn't know what to do. He almost felt as if he wanted to wrap his arms around Kaname. She would probably like that. But, would that action oblige him to do more?

"You're afraid to care about someone, because you might be forced to leave her behind. I have the same fear. I never know when you might leave for good." She banged her head against his chest. "But, do you _really_ have to leave some day? Can't you choose me instead?" Kaname felt dirty asking that, knowing full well what Sousuke had been through, and what Mithril had done for his life. But, in a way, the organization was his parent. Sooner or later, parents should let their children go. Besides, she was willing to share him with those bastards.

Couldn't they be big enough to do the same?

"You ask difficult questions, Kaname." Sousuke looked more troubled than before. "Would it be alright if we sat down?"

"Sure."

Sousuke moved a pillow and sat at one end of Kaname's couch. His eyes looked frantic for a moment, when Kaname sat directly next to him, and placed her head on his shoulder. "You know that I almost left Mithril before."

"Yes. I wish you had. Even though I am grateful for their protection of me." Kaname pursed her lips. "They're not being entirely altruistic, you know. But, it's not like I can stop being Whispered!"

"That is correct. We both know that. But we also know that I am the only one capable of piloting Arbalest. And despite occasional reassurances, the ARX-7 remains the only Lamba Driver equipped Arm Slave in Mithril." Giving into his burgeoning desires, he started slip an arm loosely around Kaname. He stopped. Gathering up his courage, and acting instead of thinking, he followed through.

Kaname wriggled some, and then snuggled against him, smiling. That had Sousuke feeling strange. But, it was not a bad strange.

"I am the only blue-haired Whispered girl at Jindai High School."

That statement had Sousuke staring straight ahead, focusing on nothing in particular. He tightened his arm around Kaname just the slightest bit. He was amazed, but not only at his own actions. When he had gotten there, Kaname had been very upset. Later, she had become very angry. Now, she seemed happy.

"But, there are other people whose safety rests in my hands, Kaname. And, I could not accomplish the things I do without Mithril. Also, a sense of purpose is a good thing, is it not?" He remembered what his life had been like, when he was little more than an animal.

"I'm very generous, Sousuke." Kaname rubbed her face against his shirt. "I'm quite willing to share. It's just the kind of girl I am. You're very lucky."

Sousuke felt a moment of panic. It almost sounded as if Kaname thought that she owned him. Worse, part of him did not seem averse to that idea. Unexpectedly, a mischievous streak he hadn't known he possessed introduced itself. Being around Mao and Weber was definitely rubbing off on him.

"I suppose if I did remain in Japan for an extended period of time…… and stopped worrying about when I would be called back to standard duty…… I could allow myself to grow and mature like other teenagers. Indeed. I could choose_ any_ girl that I wanted to accompany."

Kaname opened her eyes, frowned, and nipped Sousuke hard with her teeth. Her mischief was of a much more visceral sort.

"**Ouch!**" Sousuke jumped. "That was very painful."

"I should hope so!" Kaname snorted. "And you are very much mistaken. No matter how long you are allowed to stay in Tokyo, **_I_** will be the one who chooses the girl you want to accompany. Moron!"

Sousuke sat quietly for a while after that, rubbing the sore area. Kaname was content to sit quietly, reclining up against him. "I suppose…… uhhh…… it would not hurt to experience dating." Sousuke shocked himself even more than he surprised Kaname. "Unless the biting thing continues…"

Kaname sat up straight, feeling dizzy after having changed position so quickly."What was that? I want to make certain I hadn't fallen asleep, and wasn't dreaming or something."

"Kaname, you were snoring. Usually, that indicates that a person is asleep." Sousuke wondered why he found himself teasing Kaname in that fashion. He found himself anticipating her reaction.

"I was…… you mean…… you didn't…." Kaname twitched.

"I was joking." Sousuke actually looked and sounded a bit smug.

"Yeh, right!" Kaname smiled. "I _must_ have been asleep!" She sat up on her knees, looking down at Sousuke. "Did you mean it? Would you _really_ like to go out on dates with me?"

"If they turn out to be a pleasant experience," Sousuke said. "So far, I have been kicked, pounded upon, and bitten." He rubbed his sore spot again.

"Big baby!" Kaname pinched Sousuke's cheek. Then, overcome with exuberance, she bent down and kissed him lightly on the lips.

"Kaname…… that was a kiss…." Sousuke looked like he had stumbled upon the Loch Ness Monster in his bath tub.

"Wow. I can't put anything by you, _can_ I?" Kaname smirked. "Get used to it! People do that kind of thing on dates, you know." She suddenly felt like singing. Either that, or kissing Sousuke again.

"Uhhh…."

"It's going to take a lot of work to whip you into shape, _isn't _it Sousuke?" Kaname sighed, but didn't sound unhappy.

"It would appear so." Sousuke had visions of Basic Training. He shook his head to chase them away.

"Well then, I suppose we should get started. That kind of thing doesn't take care of itself, you know!" Kaname smiled.

"What? I don't…."

Kaname scowled. She began rapping her fingers against the back of the couch.

"Kaname?"

"What… do… you… think… you… should… do… _now_… soldier?" Kaname's mouth was a razor-straight line.

"Uhhh…… walk with you to school?" Sousuke looked up at the clock on the wall.

"**No!**" Kaname frowned. "Idiot…."

"But…. classes…." Sousuke rubbed his head. "Tell you that your clothing is especially attractive?"

"**Negative!**" Kaname shook her head. "But hold that thought…."

Sousuke went pale for a moment. He almost said 'Kiss you?' He certainly wasn't ready for that. Who knows what Kaname might answer!

"I don't…." Sousuke's thoughts flew in all directions, like a group of butterflies taking to the air. "We _are_ late from school…… you _are_ dressed very nicely…." He prepared for Kaname's next loud exclamation. But, it would buy him some more time as he tried to arrive at the correct response.

"**Baka!**" Kaname put her forehead against Sousuke's. "What have we been talking about all this time…."

"Uhhh…… we……yes….. dating…."

"Good boy!" Kaname patted Sousuke on the cheek. "I _knew_ you could do it!"

"What about dating, Kaname?"

"**AHHHHH-H-H-H-H!" **Kaname turned and faced the door, having heard footsteps approaching. "It's OK, Miss Shikomi." She had preempted her neighbor's knock.

"Kaname, you said that it was worth it, getting through difficulties." Sousuke grinned, feeling strangely free.

"I was wrong." Kaname hung her head.

"Were you expecting me to ask you on a date? Was _that_ the issue?" Sousuke guessed correctly. Finally.

"Yes." She looked up. "Don't you want to, Sousuke?"

The young Mithril pilot remained silent for a while. As short as the intermission was, Kaname felt like it was an eternity.

"When I saw Gauron again, there was little left of him. He lay helpless in bed. But, as weakened as he was, he still possessed the power to harm me. The trap he had set almost took me with him. Worse, he told me that you had been killed." Sousuke thought back to that moment. He had killed his long time adversary and barely avoided being caught in an explosion. Not long after that, Kaname had found him with the help of Wraith.

As if she wanted to memorize his reaction for all time, Kaname scrutinized Sousuke's face carefully.

"I thought I had lost you. It felt as if I had lost my remaining reasons to live." Sousuke tensed up. "No doubt our new relationship will be noted by Wraith, and word will reach my superiors. That_ could_ be a problem. Tessa will no doubt be very sad. But, that cannot be helped." His eyes held a look that Kaname couldn't interpret. "Perhaps…… for me…… allowing myself to care might prove a good thing."

A calculating look on her face, Kaname decided that she would deal with Wraith. The spy would not be any problem whatsoever, if he knew what was good for him. As for Tessa? Kaname was in no mood to gloat, despite her apparent victory. The less the other girl became a viable rival, the more she would feel sorry for her.

It couldn't be easy, being Whispered… away from people her own age… and carrying so much responsibility.

"Very good. That wasn't so hard, was it? So Sousuke, what should we do for our first date?" Kaname voice was bubbly again. "I expect _you_ to do some of the planning, you know. The girl shouldn't have to do all of the work!" For a moment, her mouth went dry.

Sousuke? Doing the planning? Would that be a good idea?

"Ahhhh. Hmmm. I had not considered the fact that dating would require strategy and tactics." Sousuke's voice had brightened considerably. "Reconnaissance will be necessary, of course. That should prove simple. But, I will need to gather intelligence, since I am _oooppphhh!"_

Kaname had swung a pillow with her full strength.

"**_Ooooo-o-o-o-h. _Don't you ruin this, mister!**" Kaname's face clouded over quickly.

"But… Kaname…"

The pillow came around again, rocking Sousuke's head back on his neck.

"It is not 'But…Kaname…'" Kaname began swinging much more lightly, in playful fashion. "Do you hear me?" She handed Sousuke a pillow.

Sousuke looked down at the overstuffed cushion, wondering why Kaname had given it to him. Was it to shield himself from her attacks? Or did she expect him to strike her in return? "I was going to suggest that one of our first dates be to the city Library, where we could do practical research into dating. That would…." He was forced to duck, as the pillow headed for his face. "Wait, it would…." He held his pillow up, blocking Kaname's forceful overhead blow. "The two of us together…."

"**_BAKA!_ BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA."**

Pillows seemed to come out of nowhere, descending from all possible angles. Sousuke blocked as well as he could, but Kaname was very determined. Finally, the young soldier released his cushion, and grabbed with both hands onto Kaname's. Yanking with all of his strength, he expected to pull it out of her grasp.

Instead, he merely pulled Kaname on top of him, her weight knocking him onto his back. He braced himself for an even fiercer attack, remembering what happened when his actions led to accidental proximity of this kind.

Kaname blushed, but smiled. She let go of the pillow and looked down at Sousuke. Seeing the look in his eyes, she was confused at first. But, she soon understood. "It's OK, Sousuke." She giggled, seeing that he had begun to sweat again. "Now that we're dating, it's not a problem" She tried to sound stern, but couldn't keep from smiling. "From now on, we will _want_ to end up like this sometimes." She pressed her weight down upon him, reveling in his shocked expression.

"Uhhh…." Sousuke swallowed hard. He realized that he was not uncomfortable. Far from it. But, he wondered just how far such situations were supposed tom go. "It feels very pleasant, but…."

"_Hmmmmmm?**" **_Kaname practically purred. She would have been very angry had Sousuke pushed her of or tried to roll out from under her. She didn't intend anything intimate, but certainly didn't mind the chance to be close to him. It was a long time in coming.

"Are you…… will you…." Sousuke was very aware of his hands. He didn't know where he should put them. He wasn't certain where he _wanted_ to put them.

"Sousuke?" Kaname was very much aware of Sousuke's scent. She blushed when she began fantasizing.

"Is it your intention to…… uhhh…… remove your clothing now?" The young soldier was very conscious of where Kaname's weight pressed down on him.

For Kaname, it felt as if someone had poured a bucket of ice water on her. She pushed away from Sousuke. "**_What!"_ **She almost looked insulted. "**You jerk! Just what kind of girl do you think I am!"**

Sousuke was taken aback. He was well aware of the fact that he knew next to nothing about women. He began to realize just how much he didn't know. "Uhhh…. very clever…." Sousuke swallowed hard, thinking quickly. "Uhhh…. very beautiful…." He sat up. "Uhhh…. very understanding…." He hoped that last comment would gain him a reprieve.

Kaname glared at him for a moment, and then sighed. She relaxed, knowing that she had overreacted. Sousuke was not the only one who had a lot of things to work on. "What am I going to do with you, Sousuke?" It was a rhetorical question. She smiled, thankful that she had successfully faced numerous challenges in her life.

"I suppose… given your past tendencies and unusual amount of tenacity…… anything that you want to." Sousuke's voice caught at the end, causing him to cough. His mouth felt somewhat dry.

Kaname grinned. She pushed the hair out of her face and looked Sousuke over, letting him know that she was doing just that. "That was a very good answer, Sousuke. There _may_ be hope for you yet!" She picked up a pillow, and tossed it in a high arc, watching as it plummeted towards Sousuke.

"Perhaps," Sousuke said, catching the pillow. "But, I wonder if the old Chinese curse might have some bearing."

"Sousuke?" Kaname frowned. She was _not_ a fan of Chinese curses. More specifically, she was not fond of _anything_ that might ruin the mood.

"'Be careful what you wish for. It may come true'." Sousuke was serious. He scratched his head, as if confronted with an unfathomable occurrence. "This is truly what you wished for?"

"Yes," Kaname said. "I may be crazy, but you're the one I choose, Sousuke." She looked somewhat shy for a moment. "You're really something special, you know. Despite everything you've been through. But…." She tugged at her hair. "You would choose me on your own, wouldn't you? You're not just doing this to make me happy,are you?"

"I would choose no other." Sousuke face was very serious. "Another Chinese expression says 'May you live in interesting times'. To most, that is also a curse. But, to me, it is what I have been used to my entire life." He brushed a pillow feather off of his school uniform. "My time in Tokyo has certainly been interesting."

Kaname twitched. 'Interesting' was not the word that she would have chosen!

"I think that is enough Chinese sayings for now, Sousuke!" She smiled. "We have better things to discuss…… _right?"_ Her smile deepened, as she slid along the couch to lean against him again.

"Perhaps one more," Sousuke said. Inexplicably, he felt very contrary at that very instant. He knew all too well that Kaname would get her ways in most things; but, he was not about to be ordered about like some raw recruit. "'A smile worth one thousand ounces of gold'."

"Oh! I like that one." Kaname took Sousuke's arm and placed it around her waist. "But that is the absolute last one. No kidding!"

"Indeed." Her response only furthered his resolve. "Did you know that there is a tragic story behind this proverb?" Sousuke looked down at Kaname's facing, catching a glimpse of her scowl. _Good. _She should know better than to make too many demands of a Specialist.

"Did you know that something tragic will happen if you try to tell me?" Kaname said flatly.

"In 780 _B.C._, Prince You of the _Zhou_ State acquired a beautiful concubine named Bao Si, who unfortunately had a poker face. After many a frustrating attempts to wring a smile from her, a minister came up with an idea. He suggested that Prince You start the signal fire on Mount Li. The fire was supposed to be used to call for help from the armies stationed away from the capital city in case of an enemy attack. Troops of the tributary countries all rushed to Prince You's rescue. When they learned that it was only a joke, the generals and troops was at a loss, not knowing to cry or to laugh." Sousuke was interrupted.

"Ha ha. Very funny joke." Kaname was growing somewhat cross.

"Seeing the awkward expressions on their faces, Bao Si broke into a smile. Prince Zhou was so happy to see her smile that he awarded the minister with a thousand _tael_ of gold. But the real price the prince had to pay later was his own life. When the real enemy attacked, he could no longer summon his armies with the signal fires, for they all thought that he was crying wolf. Consequently his state was ransacked and he himself succumbed to the enemy's sword."

"Fascinating," Kaname drawled. "I hope you get _that_ kind of thing out of your system before our dates. As I was saying…."

"I take it that you will allow me to retain some of my own habits when we spend time together? There is no way that I can change overnight, and would not expect that of you." Sousuke tried to look nonchalant. "As the saying goes, 'Be not afraid of growing slowly. Be afraid only of standing still'." He remembered one long flight, heading off for a mission. One of the pilots had lent him a book on Proverbs of the World. He had finally found a use for the knowledge he had acquired.

"There… are… other… things… to… be… afraid of… Sousuke!" Kaname slid her arm out and picked up the largest pillow within reach.

"Truly," Sousuke nodded. "Do you wish to influence me by making me afraid of your reactions? If so, I suggest that you keep one thing in mind. 'Respect out of fear is never genuine; reverence out of respect is never false'. "

"I'm not looking for reverence, Sousuke. And there are things you should be worrying about besides respect. Big idiot! You're in Kaname Chidori's world now…." Kaname tapped the pillow gently on the top of his head. "No… more… sayings…"

"I see. I am at a severe disadvantage, then." Sousuke was pleased to see that this kind of banter was not difficult for him. "'A dragon will be teased by a shrimp in shoal water; a tiger will be bullied by a dog on a treeless plain'. Accordingly, I will need to make certain that our time together takes place in neutral territory." Sousuke made it a point to rub his chin and look thoughtful.

"**_Sousuke!_**" Kaname turned around and drew the pillow back. "If you keep that up, I will teach you a lesson that you will _never_ forget!"

"I welcome your instruction, Kaname. 'A jade stone is useless before it is processed; a man is good for nothing until he is educated'."

"**SOUSUKE!**"

"Kaname?" Sousuke couldn't hide his grin any longer.

Realizing what Sousuke had been doing, Kaname couldn't help but smile. There really _was_ more to him that met the eye. That last proverb might be rather appropriate. What might he turn out to be, if he ever had a chance to live a normal life?

She reached over and gave the young soldier a quick hug. "I guess I will need to work on my temper some."

"Yes." Sousuke's voice took on a more serious tone. "It is a hardship I am willing to endure." He would use one last quotation. "'Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one'."

Kaname sighed, looking up at Sousuke. "One step at a time, I guess…."

Sousuke swallowed hard. Following his instincts, he ran his hand over Kaname's hair a number of times, amazed at its feel. Marvelling at his own audacity, he left his hand resting against her cheek.

"Affirmative."

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_END_


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